Catharsis
by teno-hikari
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte; Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or worse? [warning: yaoi (Zaha/Carrot)]
1. Chapter One

Catharsis  
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
email: teno_hikari@yahoo.com / tenohikari@cs.com  
Beta-read By: Hatsy (bluepard@adelphia.net)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story  
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte;  
Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or  
worse?   
  
Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV  
series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll  
try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the  
anime or read the manga for a few years.  
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.  
  
**********  
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
It seems what's left of my human side  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
violently it changes  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
-Disturbd 'Down with the sickness'  
  
**********  
  
  
I wake up screaming the same exact moment lightning strikes across the night sky. The thunder rumbles so loudly behind the dark clouds that I can barely hear my heart beating. Blood pounds in my ears as I try and catch my breath, while beads of sweat run down my face. A chill went down my spine as I break out in small shakes, drawing the blankets around me. Sitting up in bed, I pull my knees to my chest tightly in order to calm myself down.  
  
Squeezing my eyes shut as I run a trembling hand through the damp dark mess that's my hair, lightning strikes once again. I slow my breathing and begin to take deep breaths, trying to collect myself and stop shaking. Suddenly, my ears pick up the sound of feet pounding on the wooden floor boards of the inn we're staying at ... oh no. I quickly lie back down on the lumpy mattress, pretending to look like I'm asleep.  
  
Relax, I command myself, to still my shaking limbs. The bedroom door creaks open, and I can hear the soft footsteps of my little brother as he enters the room. Not far behind from Marron's soft steps were heavier ones that belonged to the tall blonde Sorcerer Hunter, Gateau. Much to my relief, the girls weren't with them ... otherwise I don't think they'll leave me in peace.  
  
"Carrot?" Marron whispers gently as he approaches my bedside. "Brother, are you awake?"  
  
I snore softly and resist the urge to smile at him. My brother ...wise, calm and patient towards my antics ... you're so much older than I am. His fingers are on my forehead, brushing the cool sheen of sweat from my brow. For a minute I think he knows I am awake, until he turns away, back to the door and his lover.  
  
"I guess he's all right, after all," Marron says quietly.  
  
Gateau made a low chuckle, "Probably having a nightmare of Chocolate and Tira whipping his ass again ... that's normal."  
  
"I hope so," Marron lets out a small sigh before closing the door behind them.  
  
It's not the first time I've fooled my brother, and with these nightmares, it probably won't be the last. I wish it was a normal nightmare where I'm running for my life from Tira and Chocolate in their other forms ... but it wasn't. Sitting up once again, my gaze turns to the window where I can see my frightened brown eyes reflected against the glass. It's raining heavily ... almost soothing, except for the harsh lightning that makes me shudder.  
  
Why ...?  
  
Why did I go up there to face some soul sucking sorcerer alone? Scratch that ... I know why, and agree with my friends that I'm a brainless dolt. Carrot Glace, the Sorcerer Hunter who thinks with his dick first and his brain the very last. Can't argue with the truth now, can I? Maybe Gateau was right about me, aside from being a stupid horny jerk, I must have a death wish.  
  
I've faced evil sorcerers of all kinds in the past, but never before had I felt so afraid of one. This sorcerer was different from the others we've fought against, this was a sorcerer even Big Mamma is afraid of. How powerfully evil he must be that she wanted to take his life ... but she didn't kill him ... she couldn't because of me ... because I was there. Yet again I've screwed things up for everyone, and because of my interference, that sorcerer is still alive. I don't know how I know ... I can just feel it.  
  
[ 'I found you! And this time, she will never tear us apart!' ]  
  
  
When he said those words, I was more afraid of him than falling to my death from a crumbling mountain. The dark haired sorcerer had laughed as he fell, and his laughter held something more than just insanity ... perhaps happiness? I don't know. I don't think I want to know. Lying back down once again, I pull the covers up over my head and simply stare at the darkness until my eyes can  
no longer stay open.  
  
And the nightmare begins again ...  
  
  
***************  
  
Chapter One  
  
***************  
  
  
"Darling!"  
  
"Carrot!"  
  
"...WAKE UP!"  
  
I groan in pain as both Misu sisters grab one of my arms and try to  
pull me out of bed. Once again, I'm in the object of their human tug-  
a-war game. My eyes narrow lazily, mouth filled with the pillow I was  
sleeping on and both my arms pulled up in awkward angles. You'd be  
surprised how high my tolerance for pain has become ever since I met Tira  
and Chocolate when we were little.  
  
  
"I'm awake..." I mumble before spitting the pillow out of my mouth. "ACK! You're gonna break both my arms off ... and I need those!"  
  
Tira, both the shyest and youngest of the two sisters, reluctantly lets me go before pulling her thick round glasses back up to the bridge of her nose. After releasing me, I'm suddenly pulled into Chocolate's crushing embrace. I bring my sore arms up to pry off her own before she crushes my windpipe.  
  
"Good morning, darling!" The redhead smiles cheerily at me, allowing herself to fall into my lap. I swallow hard as she inches her face closer to me ... lips just barely away from mine. Her blue eyes narrowed seductively as she began to purr. "Did you have nice dreams about me?"  
  
Tira was once again bright red and shaking with fury, "Chocolate! What do you think you're doing?! GET OFF HIM!"  
  
Unfortunately for me, she screams right into my ear while the elder Misu sister tightens her grip around my sore neck. Chocolate gives her younger sister a suspicious look. "And why should I do that, Tira? Did you want to trade places?"  
  
I didn't think it was possible, but Tira turns a deeper shade of red that matches her little red riding hood outfit. Stuttering for a response, the younger sister marches out of the bedroom, slamming the door shut behind her. Chocolate tightened her grip before leaning to rub her head against my bare chest.  
  
Her fingers wander up to my collarbone before she pulls back to look at me with worried eyes. "Carrot?" she asks seriously, "What's wrong?"  
  
Breaking out of whatever daze I was in and just look at her stupidly. "Huh?"  
  
"You're not screaming for mercy and trying to run away," she points out, folding her arms across her chest, "Now, tell me what's bothering you."  
  
"Nothing is bothering me," I yawn before climbing out of bed and shrugging into my shirt. I think I should get a new one, this one's still showing off the wear and tears of my fall, even after Tira tried to patch it up again. Sucks ... it was my favorite one too.  
  
"Carrot ..."  
  
"I don't know about you but I'm starved!"  
  
"Carrot ..."  
  
"I hope Gateau doesn't eat all the pancakes this time ..."  
  
"Carrot ..."  
  
"Maybe those hot babes I saw downstairs yesterday are still here ..."  
  
You wouldn't think getting whacked with a pillow would hurt so much. But the way Chocolate handles it, feels like Tira's mallet is inside the pillow case ... along with all of Gateau's bulky muscles. As little Dottas fly around before my eyes, Chocolate leaves me with another door slam, obviously pissed off that I wouldn't tell her anything.  
  
Twitching a little, I raise myself halfway off the floor ...and see him standing before me. The evil sorcerer who takes tortured souls within himself without a care. The sorcerer who Big Mamma had tried to kill, stares down at me with cold, violet eyes. Fully dressed now, his dark cape swishes around him as he stands perfectly still, eyes burning holes into me.  
  
"Who are you?" I find myself whispering.  
  
He doesn't respond and I shake my head, closing my eyes. 'No, you aren't here. Only in my nightmares ... but why do you haunt me?! What do you want?!'  
  
"CARROT, BREAKFAST!"  
  
  
The sound of Tira's voice and the pounding on the door snaps me back into reality. Looking forward, I find myself staring at nothing. Quietly sucking in my breath before pulling myself up to stand on two feet, I stagger to the door to answer it. Tira's hand shoots through once it is open, grabs my shirt, and literally drags me down the stairs of the Inn....  
  
... Did I mention how high my tolerance for pain is?  
  
  
********  
  
  
Okay, now I know there's something definitely wrong with me. Since Marron thought it was a good idea, I've been wandering around town to let my wounds heal away from the Misu sisters, and there are babes everywhere in sight. Young girls and single attractive women are walking around the market place, hanging out and making purchases. So what am I, the babe-oggling-bloodhound, doing? I'm sitting under some shade by myself while quietly brooding ... oh the horror. It's as if some deity has cursed me so I have no interest  
to flirt and flaunt around with the opposite sex. Or, I could just  
be having a really bad day.  
  
Looking down at my patched-up shirt, I find myself frowning. I think instead of blowing all my money on booze and food, maybe I should replace the shirt and perhaps the rest of this worn outfit as well. Yeap, there's definitely something wrong with me. Maybe I hit my head harder than I thought after my fall. Ah well, I'll kick myself in the ass later.  
  
I end up wandering around the market place some more, sticking to browsing instead of flirting. I don't think I have enough energy to be perverted today. A truly bad day for Carrot Glace. I think it has only happened to me six times in my life, but at least then I kept checking girls out. Now, the only place my eyes are focused is straight forward, wherever my feet are taking me.  
  
As the noises of the crowded market finally seem to die down, I find myself near a dark alley just at the end of town. The end of town ... which means I have a lot of walking to do on my way back to the Inn. Sighing, I am about to turn on my heal and leave when an old woman in the back of the alley calls out to me.  
  
As Tira used to say: 'curiosity killed the Carrot,' and it must be true as I find myself walking into the shadows of the secluded alley. I can't believe someone would set up a booth in the darkness away from other vendors of the market, did she really expect to make a sale this way? The old woman gives me a toothless grin before gesturing to the items on her old wooden table.  
  
"Have a look, dear ... ?" she says, black beady eyes twinkling under  
her thick gray bangs. Normally, I'd call her a hag and be on my way, instead my eyes wander over the few items on display. Mostly small pocket watches that don't look like they work anymore, old copper jewelry, some polished earth stones, scented candles, and ...  
  
I blink as my fingers brush against the soft black fabric ... it feels like the material of that cape. Oh man, why the hell did I put on his cape and wave that sword around like an idiot? Oh, right ... I am an idiot. Well, that answers that. Picking the shirt up to hold it before my eyes, I study the fine stitching at the sleeves and wonder if they could be trimmed off to make a tank top. The material is also a little stretchy and, oddly, a little heavy.  
  
"Is it cursed?" I ask in a polite tone, looking thoughtful of the piece of clothing in my hands. Past experience has always told me to be nice to old ladies who look like witches. Or anyone who can shoot lightning from their finger tips to zap you in the ass.  
  
"Just a spell," the vendor answers with a small smile, "It has resistance to certain elements. However, no one needs a shirt like this these days ... and the material is a little heavy, I ..."   
  
"How much?" I ask, rubbing the coin pouch in my pants pocket. She blinks before considering it and giving me a reasonable price which I agree to before she gives me a warning. Funny, how I get the warning after the purchase.  
  
"Just because it has resistance doesn't mean it'll keep you immortal, it only provides a little protection," She says and begins to pack up her small booth for the day. "So, don't go looking for trouble!"  
  
I laugh and pull the new shirt on and scrunch up the old one to take back with me. Hey, it was still my favorite, couldn't just throw it away. I should probably get back, the sun was setting and my friends and I would leave town early the next morning.  
  
"I don't have to look for trouble ...," I tell her, turning away to see a couple figures at the entrance of the alleyway. "It always finds me."  
  
"Hey, punk! Give me all your money, now!"  
  
See what I mean?  
  
"Did you hear me, punk?" Asks a burly man, the leader of a burly man gang. I turn my head to the old lady, and she's packed out of sight. Well, that's good ... now, all I have to worry about is not getting the crap beaten out of me. Man, they got more muscles than Gateau! okay, fearless Sorcerer Hunter, show them your sword and hope they don't call your bluff. Otherwise you're going to be leaking your intestines all the way home ... and the shirt you just bought will be completely ruined.  
  
  
********  
  
"CARROT!"  
  
Ah, another eardrum shattering yell ... just what my throbbing headache needed. Tira pulls me into the Inn and up the stairs to my bedroom, where everyone is waiting. They rise up to scold me until they see the gashes and bruises on my body ... but hey look, my new shirt's still intact! It's a little dirty, but not hanging from my shoulders in tatters.  
  
"Darling!"  
  
"Brother, what happened?"  
  
"Hey, jerk, who'd you piss off this time?"  
  
Before I can gurgle an answer, Tira pulls me into the bathroom with the first aid kit in hand. Closing the door behind us, I pull off my new shirt and examine the small dark bruises on my chest. Well, at least nothing was broken ... I don't ever want to see a nurse again ... especially a nurse with a huge ass needle she has to carry over her shoulder ... but she was hot and ...  
  
  
"AHHHH!" I shriek as Tira applies the ointment to my cuts and scrapes. She gives me the 'Stop being a wuss before it really hurts' look, and I suck in my breath and try and take it like a man. Her face looks a little flush, but it's probably because she's mad as hell and would like to beat me to a pulp if I hadn't been already.  
  
"How many times do I have to tell you not to go on anymore panty raids?" She says in my mother's scolding tone. "You're just lucky nothing's broken ..."  
  
"I wasn't," I begin, wincing at the sting of pain as she treats the last cut on my arm. "I wasn't leching out today."  
  
"Right," She snorts, rolling her red eyes behind those glasses. "I'm sure the crazy girl mob just beat you up for being a perfect gentleman?"  
  
Yeah, I knew she wouldn't believe me. Hell, even I don't believe me. Usually all my injuries are brought upon by hounding the opposite sex. However, when it came to bullies, I kicked ass (or tried to get mine kicked as little as possible) and bragged about it later ... but usually I end up running like a chicken. This time however, I hadn't run, I stood there like a man with my sword ... then woke up on the alley floor covered in bruises.  
  
Weird, those goons wanted my money, but when I checked my pockets, my coin pouch was still there and untouched. Guess they just wanted a runt to use as a punching bag to boost up their male ego. I can understand that ... for some odd reason ... at least they didn't kill me.  
  
"All finished," Tira dusts her hands off before placing them on her hips. "Now, what happened?"  
  
"Just got my ass kicked," I shrug. "Nothing new."  
  
"What about that shirt?" she asks, looking at dirty black garment held in my hand.  
  
"I bought it."  
  
A delicate eye brow is raised over the rim of her glasses and I throw up my hands in exasperation. "Honestly, Tira! I maybe a lazy pervert, but not a thief!"  
  
Perhaps it's the tone of my voice or the pleading look in my eyes, but she just nods and accepts the answer. Taking the black shirt from my hands, she mumbles something about having it cleaned by morning, then moves to leave. The bathroom door swings open again as Chocolate (who was obviously listening in) bounds into the room, throwing her arms around me in a tight and painful hug.  
  
"Darling, I was so worried!"  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
Whatever commotion that was happening immediately stops after I speak. My brother and Gateau stand in the door way, looking at me as if Big Mamma herself were perched on my head. Well, it did feel kinda heavy ...  
  
"Huh? Why are you staring at me?" I ask. "I know I look like shit."  
  
"No, it's not that," Gateau speaks first. "You said you were sorry."  
  
"Darling is finally becoming responsible!" Chocolate cries, crushing  
me even more. "I'm so happy!"  
  
"Brother?" Marron asks with his ever present serious amber stare. "Are you all right?"  
  
"Just fine," I wave him off, trying to pry Chocolate's steel grip. "Look, I just got my ass kicked after falling off a mountain Big Mamma destroyed, so I've had a rough couple of days."  
  
"I understand," Marron nods as he places a hand on Chocolate' shoulder and slowly pulls her back. "We'll let you rest for the night, brother."  
  
"Take it easy," says Gateau with a flash of concern in his eyes, before he turns to walk out the door.  
  
"Call us if you need anything," my brother tells me, giving me a gentle hug before following his lover.  
  
"Sweet dreams, darling!" Chocolate pounces me again. I think she really does enjoy causing me pain. "Wait ... you didn't eat dinner, I'll go to the kitchen downstairs and ..."  
  
"That's okay," I tell her, shaking my head. "I'm not that hungry."  
  
"Darling," she insists, her blue eyes narrowing. "You have to regain your strength, and I think some soup might ..."  
  
"Chocolate," I haven't used this commanding tone of voice since we were kids. I try to soften my tone and give her a slight smile. "Please."  
  
"All right, Carrot," She sighs before giving me a light peck on the cheek an older sister would. "Call me if you need anything."   
  
"I will, goodnight."  
  
The door closes behind her, and I'm left alone. Alone ... that's what I wanted, right? My head hurts even more without them to distract me ... how odd. Lying down in bed, I extinguish the candles, plunging the room into darkness. The nightmare I had the night before slowly returns to haunt me.  
  
I lie there for hours, even long after I hear my friends retire for the night. Please don't let me dream about him again ... please just let me have a normal nightmare and wake up as normal, Sorcerer Hunter, Carrot Glace. I snort to myself. Normal, Sorcerer Hunter, Carrot Glace? How those words clash with themselves.  
  
For one, I was never normal. Unlike the others, I can't control my powers ... every time I get hit by any kind of magic, I go berserk. Second, I'm not much of a Sorcerer Hunter. Honestly, I only joined because of my friends ... they trained and I slacked off. The only useful thing I do is turn into those creatures ... how pathetic ...I'm only useful when I'm not human. I'm such a wuss ... I hate feeling sorry for myself ... and I hate crying the most.  
  
It's raining again ... and the rain pours heavily tonight, tapping insistently against my window. Turning my head to the side, my blood freezes despite the fact that my heart is beating rapidly. So loud, I thought it was going to burst free from my chest.  
  
He's here again.  
  
Standing at my bedside, the dark sorcerer of nightmares towers before my sprawled form, and I'm to paralyzed with fear to do anything about it. He raises his hand ... the hand he used to crush the clay water bowl out of shock, and slowly reaches out to my throat. Swallowing hard, my gaze locks onto his, expecting him to strangle me.  
  
But he doesn't ... his hands are warm as they brush against my bare skin, making my hair stand on end. Fingers trail down my torso, leaving goose bumps in their wake, and come to rest on my bandaged arm. I can't think, can't scream out, can't lash out as my body simply tenses at his touch.  
  
"My poor, child," he says in a low voice. "This world has made you suffer so..."  
  
"Who?" I manage to ask after breathing once again. "Who are you?"  
  
There's a look of amusement on his face along with the slowly forming smile I had seen when I asked if he was married. He laughed in amusement and I had smiled like a stupid child that I am. A strong hand firmly grips my chin and pulls me up and nearly out of bed towards his face.  
  
His breath is warm against my cheek and I can smell the night air on him. This ... this isn't a dream! He's here! He's really here in my bedroom and I ... I ... I can't do a damn thing about it!  
  
"All the answers to your questions will come soon enough," he tells me. Fingers run up the nape of my neck and I begin to shiver; his warm touch has turned to ice. "You will remember everything, my Carrot Glace."  
  
My brain seems to awaken momentarily as I begin to pull back and fight against his hold. Trying to look brave, I hiss out between clenched teeth, "Let me ... let me go!"  
  
His amused smile widens slightly before his grip tightens painfully on my jaw, a warning that he could dislocate it if he pleased. He leans forward; long and dark violet strands of his hair fall against my trembling face as his lips seek out mine. My eyes grow large to the point where I think they will fall out of their sockets, as he invades my mouth with his tongue. The kiss is short; he pulls away and whispers against my parted lips while my brain tries to figure out what's going on.  
  
"Never."  
  
Thunder strikes and I find myself jolting up from bed in another cold sweat. Gasping, I look around wildly for any trace of the sorcerer and find myself relieved to see none. Get a hold of yourself, Carrot, it was just another nightmare. He's not here ... he was never here.  
  
I bring my hand to my lips to wipe away the coat of saliva and the taste of ... wine? Was I drinking? I think I must have had some on my way back to the Inn. My jaw hurts, but it is probably because I had the shit kicked out of me today. I ache everywhere. Okay, this is all just nightmare ... some crazy dream I conjured up to scare myself. Go back to sleep, Carrot, and have your normal nightmares and wet dreams. Don't think about that man ... don't think about ...  
  
My eyes lock onto something and the rusty gears in my head begin to turn ... there on my pillow. A single but long strand of dark violet hair. The wind howls outside my window and, despite the noise, I can hear his voice whisper into my ear to taunt me.  
  
'You are mine.'  
  
  
[ Author's Notes ]  
  
Even after reading some the manga, watching the TV series, and some  
of the OVA ... I really don't think Carrot is the big idiot we  
believe him to be. As for Zaha wanting Carrot in ::cough:: that  
way ... is completely my fault. In the TV episode that they meet  
[I'm going to ramble on about some spoilers, run now if you don't  
wanna know] ...  
  
  
Carrot rushes up the mountain (wearing Zaha's cape ^^;) just before  
Big Mamma is going to kill him. She can't because Carrot is in the  
area, and Zaha (who's wearing nothing but his underwear #^^#) taunts  
her but not aware who the foolish young man is, then falls off the  
part mountain he was standing on to the rocks below (ouch). Carrot,  
the Sorcerer Hunter, sees the dark Soul Sucking Sorcerer fall, and  
goes to his rescue.  
  
When Zaha comes to (now wearing his cape), Carrot is looking after  
even after he tried to kill the young man, the Sorcerer Hunter  
rushes off to give him some water (for the exchange of village girl  
who's fixated on Zaha). So, Sorcerer and Sorcerer Hunter find  
themselves sitting at a campfire while making conversation (in the  
dubbed, we get to hear what Carrot thinks of Marron and Gateau's  
relationship ^^;). Anyway, Zaha admits that he likes Carrot and asks  
for his name ... when Carrot tells him, Zaha goes nuts again.  
Yeah, I know a Carrot/Zaha pairing is waaaay out there in yaoiverse  
but thought I'd be brave enough to give it a try ...  
  
You may now throw your stones ::runs:: 


	2. Chapter Two

Catharsis  
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
email: teno_hikari@y... / tenohikari@c...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story  
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte;  
Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or  
worse?   
  
Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV  
series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll  
try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the  
anime or read the manga for a few years.  
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.  
  
**********  
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
It seems what's left of my human side  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
violently it changes  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
-Disturbd 'Down with the sickness'  
  
**********  
  
  
The Stellar Church is the one place we ever talk to Big Mamma in person. More than just our leader and employer, she is like our mother since none of us had parents anymore. It's weird how I can't remember the deaths of my own mother and father. I always told myself that I had to be the leader, and leaders had to be strong. I had to be strong for my little brother, our adopted sisters, and Gateau ... even though he was a little jerk who grew up into a great big one ... that's not true, he's okay ... sometimes ...  
  
"Welcome, Sorcerer Hunters," She smiles serenely at all of us like she normally does. Dotta hovers alongside Big Mamma and waves happily. "Thank you for coming, it's not often that we see each other."  
  
This is true. When we first started working shortly after our training, we used to report to her in person at least twice a month. Now that we're older, we've been running around Spooner Continent hunting villainous sorcerers. Most of the time we're so busy that was don't get to see Mamma in person for several months.  
  
"Hey, Big Mamma," I smile up at her, hoping that she isn't pissed off that I accidentally prevented her from killing that sorcerer guy. I waggle my eyebrows at the winged girl who was now hovering in my direction. "Heeelllooo, Dotta!"  
  
I can hear the sound of grinding teeth from behind and a second later, Tira and Chocolate mallet me into a pancake. Yeap, I guess everything is back to normal ... ugh, normal is painful. Dotta giggles as I spring back to my feet while rubbing the forming lump on my head. My friends and Big Mamma continue their pleasantries.  
  
From the corner of my eye, I spot one of the Haz Knights ... the only one cloaked in white, the leader. Strange. Normally all four of them are always at Mamma's side, always there to protect and do her bidding. They are the elite in our line of work ... Mamma sends them out into battles we wouldn't have a prayer of winning. So why is he only one here? And is it my imagination, or is he staring right at me?  
  
"Darling!" Chocolate shoots me an annoyed glare. I immediately spin to see Big Mamma looking displeased with my lack of attention.  
  
"Don't worry," I stutter, glancing at my teammates for support. "We'll handle the case!"  
  
Gateau lets out a low groan while mumbling 'moron' under his breath. Which meant that I missed something important in the conversation while I was zoning out. Nothing new, and I give a small sigh while trying to look serious. It's not so much of a chore these days, pretending everything was all right is a different matter.  
  
"I'm sorry, Mother," I apologize, stepping forward and bowing my head. Big Mamma gasps quietly and there's a collective noise of surprise from the others behind me. "Whatever you need me to do ... I'll do it."  
  
A warm and soft hand slides over my cheek, lifting my head to look into her gentle, ruby colored eyes. Pink lips give me a small smile before kissing me on the forehead. Stunned, I'm released and simply stare at her dumbly. Okay, this is weird.  
  
"That's sweet of you, Carrot," she says, drawing back upon her pedestal. "I have assigned the Sorcerer Hunters on yet another case. "However ..."  
  
Her eyes are locked onto mine and the smile is gone. "You will remain here at the Church."   
  
The color drains from my face, and slowly, I shake my head. Please don't let this be what I think it is! "Big Mamma ... Mother, please ... don't take me off the team!"  
  
At the tone of anguish in my voice, she simply blinks in surprise and yet again my team mates were groaning behind me. Yeesh, two bad days in a row. "You're not ... are you?"  
  
"Of course not," she answers, shaking her head a little. "You are simply in no condition to work on this case, and I would like you to stay here and rest."  
  
Did I hear right? Big Mamma was giving *me* another day off? No work? I continue to stare with that stupefied expression, then pinch myself. I'm not dreaming ...I'm not! "Sure, Big Mamma! Whatever you say!"  
  
She gives a small laugh before dismissing the others. I happily wave them off on their way. Tira and Chocolate warn me not to sneak out to hunt for girls, and I tell them that I'm not in the mood for an ass-whipping. Once they're gone, I stretch my arms before letting them fall to my sides, turning to Big Mamma who clearly has more to say.  
  
"Now, Carrot," she says quietly, once the group of Sorcerer Hunters and Dotta have left. Big Mamma's white Haz Knight is now flanked at her side. The once gentle smile is yet again replaced with a stern and serious look that makes me swallow hard. "We need to talk."  
  
  
***************  
  
Chapter Two  
  
***************  
  
  
Ever since I was little, adults used the phrase: 'we need to talk' as the beginning of a 'you screwed up' speech. If not that, it was an opening line for something bad that was about to happen. The way Big Mamma looks at me, I'm certain she's still mad about me getting between her and that guy she wanted to kill. This says a lot about how evil the Sorcerer has to be, if Big Mamma wants him dead. She opens her mouth to speak, and I'm about to fall to my knees and beg for forgiveness, when she reaches out to cup my chin once more.  
  
"I'm not angry with you," She answers my unspoken question.  
  
Surprised, I was sure she was going to scold me. "You're not?"  
  
"I was very worried about you, Carrot," The tone of her voice is soft, and it makes my heart ache even more with guilt. "I consider you ... all of you to be my children, and whenever one of you is in danger, I worry."  
  
"I know, mother," I whisper faintly, wondering why I'm addressing her as the Haz Knights did whenever they spoke before us. "And ... and I'm sorry I was at the wrong place at the wrong time."   
  
I leave out the fact that I did the stupid stunt just to impress a girl. How pathetic ... I didn't even get to see her after my ordeal since my friends showed up to haul me to a hospital. I don't think Big Mamma would find it comforting to know that I would throw my life away for something as meaningless as sex. Well, certainly I didn't think it was so meaningless, but I'm sure Big Mamma and the others would.  
  
"I don't blame you for that," a pleased and surprised look crossed her features at my unusual attitude. Maybe Chocolate was right about the whole me responsibility thing. "But, I must ask what happened while you were in his company."  
  
"Uh, okay," I nod, drawing back a little into a more comfortable standing position. "Where should I start?"  
  
"After my apparition had departed," Big Mamma answers, clasping her hands together. "I would like to know what happened between the time I left and reappeared."  
  
I nod once again, looking at the polished marble floor while collecting my thoughts. Big Mamma wants to know everything about that time, maybe even about the nightmares I've been having the past few days. Oh man! What was she going to think about that kiss?!  
  
"Carrot?" comes her gentle but demanding voice.  
  
"Well," I begin and clear my throat, looking back at Big Mamma and her only present Haz Knight. "After you left, he was standing in the same place and was mumbling something I couldn't hear from that distance ... then he looked straight at me ... and fell off the cliff ..."  
  
  
********  
  
  
I can only stare helplessly as I watch the half-naked sorcerer fall. The sickening sound of his body against those rocks below makes me wince and want to turn away. I should turn away, if Big Mamma hadn't killed him that fall sure would. I shrug out of his cape - what the hell possessed me to put it on in the first place?! - and am about to turn back down the mountain when ...  
  
What was that noise?  
  
Groans? Yes, groans of pain, meaning that the sorcerer is still alive. Great, now what am I going to do? Common sense tells me that I should just leave him there and that Big Mamma would come back to finish him off later. But then ... then what if she didn't? What if he was left to rot away with his body broken and bleeding?  
  
I don't believe in long suffering deaths, after all, I suffer almost every day at the hands of the Misu sisters. Well, I guess it isn't the same thing ... this guy just devoured almost a hundred lost souls. I know he deserves to die, but just not like this ...  
  
Before I know what I am doing, I find myself halfway to where the sorcerer lays. My pace slows down when I approach those jagged rocks. Have to be careful or else I could fall and break my legs ... and then we're both screwed. He groans again, it's good to know that he hasn't died out on me yet. When I do reach him, I'm surprised to see that he doesn't have a lot of injuries from the fall ... but there are a lot of scars all over his body. No limbs are bent in awkward angles, so I guess he hasn't broken anything. Now comes the hard part ... he isn't light!  
  
Taking deep breaths, I try and pull him up against my back, almost toppling the both of us over. Steady ... steady ... I just have to keep us balanced. Ergh! This guy is like Gateau - all muscle - and I wish he could loan them to me for awhile so I can easily haul his evil ass back up the freaking mountain.  
  
Don't know how I did it, but I manage to get us back up by sunset. He looks fine, just overly exhausted from exerting himself. I, on the other hand, look ready to die. Every muscle and bone in my body aches and screams at me for never listening to my brain. Panting heavily, I wrap the Sorcerer up in his cape to stop me from ogling his scars, and let him lean against the smooth surface of the mountain side. After my ordeal, I collapse onto the ground and  
almost into his lap... Not good! Scrambling backwards to put distance between us, I notice that the sun has set, and it would be completely dark in a matter of minutes.  
  
This means I can't leave until morning. Not unless I want to hike down the mountain in the dark and possibly break every bone in my body on the way. Also, I'm tired as hell, so why not just take my chances with the half naked Soul Sucking guy here and hope he doesn't kill me? Well, just in case, I still have my sword on me and if he decides to use magic ... all the better.  
  
He awakes about a half hour later, after I've made a camp fire and am now staring off into the night sky. The twinkling stars look so close from where I sit. It's as if I could just reach out and pluck them from the dark velvet sky. My attention is now on the Sorcerer who shifts into a more comfortable position, violet eyes narrowing wearily as he takes in his surroundings ... then me. I swallow hard and give him my nervous 'please don't kill me' smile.  
  
Okay, Carrot, let's think up some excuses why he shouldn't kill you  
on the spot. Think ... think! Think! Think!  
  
  
'I love Sorcerers!'  
  
Uh, no ... he may get the wrong idea ...  
  
  
'I saved your life!'  
  
I just carried you up the mountain and accidentally banged your  
skull against some sharp rocks several times. Sorry about that.  
  
  
'Don't kill me, or I'll tell Big Mamma on you!'  
  
Okay, the guy isn't a whiny five year old brat...  
  
  
'You don't want my soul, it's dirty!'  
  
Good grief, I'm gonna die.  
  
  
He shifts again in his sitting position, and I tense up and try not to look panicked. His strong hand, the one he used to absorb those souls reaches up to brush the dark strands of hair from his face. His gaze lowers to see that he's now wearing his cape, and then moves back to me. Breathe, Carrot, just act normal ... and don't tell him you're a sorcerer hunter...it surely won't start this conversation on the right foot.  
  
  
"Oh, good you're awake," I state the obvious with a retarded smile. "I thought you really had it when you hit those rocks ... those sharp and jagged rocks."  
  
"You brought me back up here?" he asks, quickly piecing everything together. His voice is low and suspicious, violet eyes narrowing dangerously, so sharp they could spill blood. "Why?"  
  
I poke at the fire with a stick, taking my eyes off him while trying to make up some kind of decent answer. Why? A simple question, huh? Well, here's a simple answer: I'm out of my freaking mind! "I just couldn't leave you there ..."  
  
Sure I could! I could have just turned and walked away like my brain told me to, but when do I ever listen to it? He raises an eyebrow at my response and says nothing more, now he's just staring. His eyes size me up, and it looks like he's trying to figure something out ...probably the best way to kill me. This is so pathetic, I'm actually shaking while sitting close to the fire. I don't think I've ever been afraid of any Sorcerer I had to face in the past. But this one, this man's very gaze chilled me to the bone.  
  
  
'Stop staring at me, you're giving me the creeps!'  
  
Usually, when I'm both nervous and scared out of my mind, my mouth ends up babbling nonsense. It's a survival instinct to distract the enemy with words until I come up with a plan of action ... or run like hell. But it doesn't look like I'll be running away from this mountain in the complete darkness. He's surprised by my outburst and actually looks interested in what I have to say. It takes me a few minutes to slow down and understand exactly what the  
hell I'm talking about. Of course it's the subject I'm fond of: women. I tell him about the beautiful girl I ran into this afternoon and how she has a thing in him, but he doesn't look like he cares ... which is good for me.  
  
"Take it from me, I don't think that chick's gonna go for that whole Soul Sucking thing, ya' know what I mean?" I smile and raise my hands into the air to imitate what I had seen. "Your 'Aww, come to me, be one with me, eat me, beat me!' is a sorry excuse for a pickup line."  
  
He really was paying attention because now he's glaring. His eyes are even scarier now, nailing into me like I'm a pin cushion. "You saw?"  
  
In seconds, the Sorcerer is standing right before me with sword raised above his head. I am so going to die ... and all I can do is just stare with a horrified expression on my face. What really sucks about this is that I'm gonna die a virgin. One of the things I feared most. The sword wavers in his hand, as if he can't keep a firm grip on it anymore, then his body begins to sway. Eyes roll back into his head and he topples over ... on to me.  
  
'This must be the worst day of my life...'  
  
I feel all light headed and warm when I regain consciousness. Had I fainted? Or am I dead? I seem to recall a sword ready to slice me open and now my eyes are looking up at the stars once again. I can hear the sound of crackling fire nearby and heavy breathing that is very close to my ear. My back hurts ... I think I'm lying down on rocks ... and something heavy is pressing me into the ground. Something ... something warm and nice ... and smelling good ...  
  
Wait a minute ....  
  
Swallowing hard, I look down at myself and see him, correction: I see him lying on me in a very compromising position. My mouth opens up to release a silent scream as I wiggle out from underneath his warm weight. Okay, this is getting to weird for me ... I need to get away from the guy... I need to take a cold shower!   
  
Darkness or no darkness, I'm getting off this mountain right now! It doesn't take so long to get down since I'm practically leaping instead of running, and the first thing on my mind is cold water. I remember seeing a pond nearby where I met that girl, and that's exactly where my feet take me to. I think it must be my zoanthropy powers, because I don't recall having night vision before. I spot the pond in the pitch black darkness.  
  
Shrugging out of my clothes, I dive into the pond, then quickly jump back out. I was only in the freezing water for a few seconds, and it felt like a hundred knives stabbing into me. Again, I curse my stupidity and my brain just sighs ... one of these days it is going to walk out on me. Trembling, I collapse into a boneless heap on the grass.  
  
This is normal right? It's practically normal to get aroused this easily...and... who the hell am I kidding?! This isn't normal! It's abnormal! Super abnormal! I like women, dammit! Beautiful women and cute girls ... I get turned on just by looking at them. So, what I just felt isn't because of that guy? I'm just going through withdrawal ... I don't like guys ... I don't get turned on by them looking at me ... or laying on me ... and ... dammit!  
  
I sit up, naked and trembling with cool water dripping down my skin, letting the warm summer breeze air-dry me. This isn't such a big deal, just dry off and put your clothes on, then go babe hunting as soon as you leave this place. You'll forget all about snuggling up with another man. Good idea, brain! Knew I could count on you!   
  
After I dry off, I shrug into my clothes before turning to look at the full moon in the sky. A full moon sure makes people act funny ... maybe it's just the beast in me. Running a hand through my damp hair, my eyes spot a discarded water bowl where my sword and belt lay on the ground. I reach down and pick it up in both hands. The girl I met this afternoon probably dropped this. That's right, I bet she was collecting water from the pond before those spirits showed up.  
  
I should probably go return it to her. A wicked grin crosses my features. Maybe she'll repay me in the way I want. Then she'll ask about that guy. Oh, great ... I was trying not to think about him! Or specifically, him on top of me. Okay, it's time to leave now!   
  
Putting my belt back on, sword sheathed at the side and with the bowl in hand, I head back towards her place. Yeah, I'm sure her family would like it if I returned this to them. Everyone needs water ... even soul sucking sorcerers. Oh crap. Turning back to look at the mountain, I wonder if he's okay ... he did just collapse all of a sudden ... maybe he needs help. Maybe I should bring him some water.  
  
'Maybe you should just admit that you're attracted to men and then impale yourself on his sword!' my brain shouts at me. But it already knows it's beaten as soon as I dip the bowl into the water. As I walk slowly back up the mountain, I wonder if he has woken up. I really hope not. Just want to leave the bowl and run back down the mountain and out of this place ... I need a vacation away from this vacation. Wait until I get back to work, Big Momma's probably going to be pissed off. I wonder what she looks like when she's pissed off ... probably scarier than both Chocolate and Tira in their other  
forms. Don't want to think about it ... that's just too horrifying.  
  
Unfortunately for me, he is conscious when I return and sitting in the spot he was stitting in before. The sorcerer looks up with a small bit of surprise on his face to see me almost running back. And why shouldn't he be surprised? He tried to kill me and I've come back to his aid ... I'm sure he's come to the conclusion that I am a complete moron.  
  
"Here," I offer the water bowl to him while catching my breath. "Thought you would need some..."  
  
I know I did ...  
  
The surprise is quickly replaced with doubt and suspicion before he reaches for the bowl. My brain decides to take over, and I pull the water bowl just out of his reach, making sure I had his attention. His glaring attention.  
  
"Let's make a deal," I tell him, trying not to look directly into his eyes, as if they could suck my soul out. "An exchange ... you leave that hot babe to me, and I'll get you all the water you want."   
  
After I make my proposal, the sorcerer just stares at me blankly, and I wish I could dive back into that pond. The feeling of a hundred knives stabbing into me would have been better than this. "Come on," I urge. "You're killing me."  
  
Your gaze is killing me. Just take the water and let me leave in one piece...  
  
He nods once, and I hold back a sigh of relief as I hand the bowl over to him. Sitting down in my original spot, I watch with a little fascination as he gulps the cool water down. When he's finished, he lets out a low sigh ... his voice sounds less strained than before. He holds the bowl in his hand like one would a wine glass, and I almost jump back to my feet.  
  
"Want me to go get you more?" I ask.  
  
"No," he answers. "Not right now."  
  
I think I would have been relieved if he had just told me to leave him the hell alone. He's looking directly at me now, no longer glaring. "Tell me," he begins as I start poking at the fire again with a stick. "What's a boy like yourself doing here?"  
  
"I'm on vacation from work," I answer truthfully. "Just wanted to get away and pursue women ... but I've found out that there's not many here."  
  
"You saw me earlier today," says the Sorcerer. "Aren't you afraid of me?"  
  
You have no idea ...  
  
"Not really," I shrug. "There are scarier things in this world."  
  
A delicate eyebrow raises, and I can see a flash of amusement in his features.  
  
"Indeed," he says while nodding in agreement.  
  
"Why do it?" I find myself asking. "The soul sucking-stealing thing...?"  
  
"I wanted the power," he simply answers.  
  
"But there's more to life than just power," I tell him, surprised on how calm I was being. "I mean life's too short... once you have power, it can easily be lost. Why not just settle down? Meet some women?"  
  
"I'm not interested in women."  
  
I'm not going to blush ... I'm not going to blush ...  
  
"You're not?" I ask in a small voice. "Then you like men? My little brother is like that ... he's not fully open about it, but checks guys out when they're not looking."   
  
I wonder if I strain my ears enough, maybe I can hear Marron sneezing.  
  
"There's this other guy I know, he likes both men and women ... but is mainly attracted to my brother."  
  
"And what about you?" he asks. "Are you like your brother or the other man?"  
  
Why do you want to know?! I'm not going to freak out ... I am not going to freak out...  
  
"No, I totally like women," I answer a little too quickly. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I give him an assuring smile. "I'm telling you, it's the best thing! Go out with a woman, and it'll change your life!"  
  
"My life has been changed enough, thank you," he says thickly, staring down at his hands.  
  
"Whoa ... did you make some sort of vow?" I ask.  
  
I could understand if it were a marriage vow. After a wedding, you're stuck with the same woman for life. Til death due us part and all that. The amusement on his face grows wider and to my surprise, he laughs. I find myself smiling... just glad he's not glaring daggers at me anymore. The sorcerer turns to me with a smile on his face, not an evil sorcerer smile; but one a man would give to his friend.  
  
"You might say that," he says. "I like you, boy ..."  
  
Not in *that* way I hope ...  
  
"Tell me, what is your name?" asks the Sorcerer. "What do they call you?"  
  
"Well, the ladies call me the 'Love Machine'," I lie confidently. At least that's what I hope for them to call me someday. "But, my name is Carrot Glace."  
  
The smile is instantly gone as if someone slapped it off his face. His violet eyes go wide, and my nervousness quickly returns. "Carrot?" he repeats. "Carrot Glace?!"  
  
I nearly jump out of my skin as the clay water bowl in his hand is crushed to pieces without him wincing in pain. His skin must have been impervious or something. The Sorcerer rises to face me once again, sword in his hand. This isn't good...  
  
"Oh, no," Realization kicks in. "No ... don't tell me that you're some girl's father, are you?!"  
  
It has happened before. When I 'accidentally' grabbed a girl in her chest area, her father came out looking for me. Threatening bodily harm with sharp implements. "I swear to God, I didn't touch her!"   
  
The enigmatic smile on his face doesn't falter as moves closer. The sword in his hand is raised above my head once more. So much for our exchange ... what do I do now?! Why am I rooted to the spot in fear?! Normally, in this type of situation, my legs would have already taken me down the mountain, running a hundred miles per minute. With that blade in the air and me frozen in fright, it just feels familiar...horribly familiar.  
  
"YOU ARE MINE!"  
  
Before he can strike, I hear Big Mamma scream out my name and then there's an explosion. The ground beneath us begins to rumble and finally breaks apart, dividing us. The look on his face is one of pure rage, while mine is one of fear.  
  
"NO!" He yells and extends his hand to try and grab me.  
  
The next thing I know is that I'm falling ... probably to my death. My eyes see his body tossed backwards, but he is still smiling ... and laughing.  
  
"I found you!" he shouts triumphantly. "And this time, she will never tear us apart!"  
  
********  
  
  
"Then I woke up and found myself still alive," I finish with a deep breath. There, that was it ... I had just told Big Mamma all that happened. Er ... minus the part where I got aroused because he fell on top of me. I don't think she needed to know that. Hell, I wish I didn't know about it.  
  
Both she and the white Haz Knight had been silent throughout my whole story. There is an unreadable expression on Big Mamma's face, and I wonder if it has anything to do with what the Sorcerer last said to me. Probably, I still don't know what he meant. Just when I am about open my mouth to ask, she smiles and holds up her hand to silence me.  
  
"Thank you, Carrot," she says. "But now it is time for you to sleep."  
  
"Sleep?" I ask curiously. "But I don't feel tired, Big Mamma...I...I..."  
  
I can't seem to complete that sentence as the room begins to spin around me. Everything turns into one big blur, and all I can see is white. My knees buckle, unable to support my weight any longer as I fall into strong arms. My blurry vision meets the aqua colored eyes and crimson lips of the Haz Knight leader.   
  
"You ...," I slur as I feel my weight being lifted off the ground. My eyes can't seem to stay open for some reason, and I find myself pressed against his chest. "Really look like a girl ..."  
  
He chuckles lightly and everything goes black.  
  
  
[ Author's Notes ]  
  
Muwahahaha!  
  
Just to point out, I'm going all AU from here on out. I know Onion didn't die (just read the manga, thanks Celeste!) but he was killed off in my version. Yes, I know I'm evil. 


	3. Chapter Three

Catharsis  
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
email: teno_hikari@yahoo.com / tenohikari@cs.com  
Beta-read By: Hatsy (bluepard@adelphia.net)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story  
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte; Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or worse? Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the anime or read the manga for a few years.  
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.  
  
**********  
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
It seems what's left of my human side  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
violently it changes  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
-Disturbd 'Down with the sickness'  
  
**********  
  
  
The first thought that comes to my mind when I wake is: why did I have to wake up?! It's been awhile since I had a restful night's sleep that didn't have any haunting dreams of dark sorcerers and past trauma that I can't even remember. If I couldn't remember it, then it must not have existed, right? Still...that familiar near- death scene plagues my mind: a sword raised above my head. That time on the mountain, I was overcome with terror ... and a frightening sense of deja vu.  
  
"Carrot?"  
  
My eyes lock onto Dotta, who stands at the side of the bed, smiling slightly, but with a hint of worry on her face. I give her a small grin before sitting up in bed ... bed ... who's bed am I in? Am I still at the church? Wait ... when did I go to sleep? My memory is so fuzzy ...  
  
"Morning, Dotta," I say, yawning and stretching my limbs before taking in the unfamiliar bedroom. I think I'm still at the church ... either that or a fancy hotel.  
  
"It's nighttime, silly," Dotta giggles. "You've slept throughout the day. Big Mamma wanted me to check up on you before I went to bed. I'm sorry I woke you."  
  
"Oh ... that's okay."  
  
She looks at me expectantly, perhaps waiting for me to say something perverted, like asking for an invitation to join her. But the thought hadn't even crossed my mind. I slept through the day? Was I really that tired after reporting to Big Mamma and her Haz Knight?  
  
"Ne, Dotta?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Are the others back yet?"  
  
"Uh, no," She shakes her head. "But I'm sure they'll be finished with the case soon..."  
  
"What's it about?" I ask while smoothing over my sleep tousled hair. I really hope they can handle it ... but, then again, they usually do. I'm the only one out of the group who can't handle my own unless the enemy blasts me with magic. Then, for my troubles, I get beaten down once again ... it's not my fault I can't control my transformation.  
  
"Well, there's been disappearances at the town you guys were at last."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Carrot?" She hovers over me slightly. "Are you okay? Maybe you should go back to sleep."  
  
"I'm fine, Dotta," I tell her, climbing out of the large and comfortable bed. "Just a little hungry."  
  
"I thought so," She smiles. "Dinner is being served in the dining hall, I'll go with you if you want some company."  
  
I smile, pulling my boots on, but leaving the sword and sheath behind. "That's okay. Thanks for the offer, though ... but you should probably go to bed."  
  
"Carrot?"  
  
"Hmmm?"  
  
Dotta reaches out and places a hand on my forehead. "You don't seem sick ... are you sure you're okay?"  
  
"I'm fine," I repeat, assuring the winged girl with one of my wide and goofy smiles. "Just need some food, that'll perk me right up."  
  
"Uh, okay," She is still looking at me as if I have grown a second head. "Don't drink too much, all right?"  
  
"Only enough to get me drunk!" I give her a wink before running out of the room, laughing. However, once I am down the hallway, after turning a corridor that looks familiar, I stop my facade. The smile melts away, and the happy laughter dies in my throat. I really don't plan on getting drunk, not when I'm in this condition and by myself. Maybe Big Mamma will want to eat with me ... does she even eat at all?  
  
Man... I hate being alone. No one to talk to around this place ... and, honestly, I wanted Dotta's company. But, when she mentioned that she was going to bed, I could see the tired look on her face. As far as I know, I believe Dotta is Big Mamma's only servant who does the chores for this place. Just can't picture any of the Haz Knights in their full armor, dusting around Stellar Church.  
  
The main hall doors are slightly open when I reach them. Maybe the others came back, and Dotta wasn't there for their arrival. A smile forms once more on my face, and I'm about to enter until I hear voices...voices that did not belong to any of my teammates. Okay there must be a meeting going on, which means that Big Mamma is busy, and I should probably leave and not bother her. I also don't think she'll be a pleasant dinner companion either, not by the sound of her raised voice. It's weird ... I've never heard Mamma raise her  
voice in anger before. She must be really mad ... hopefully not at me. But, why would she be, after telling me she wasn't? Well, I think it's time to go eat ...  
  
"Your way is foolish, woman!"  
  
I freeze in my tracks. The sounds of my breathing along with the beating of my heart seem to stop all together. That voice, his voice...please, God, let this be a nightmare. It has to be, there's no way he could be here at the church right now!   
  
I lean back a little and peek through the small crack between the open doors. Who is this guy who stalks my nightmares and is now arguing with Big Mamma? My eyes scan around the room and see Mamma standing in the place she's always in, her gentle face is frowning at their 'guest,' whose back is to me. The Haz Knights are fully assembled before her, weapons drawn against the single man who stands in the center of the room. I take in that familiar black cape, the shoulder length dark hair, and forget to breathe again. He's here ... he's really here again ... why aren't they trying to kill him this time?!  
  
"Release them at once!" Mamma commands, her voice threatening. I didn't believe it was possible for her to sound threatening and cold.  
  
Even with his back to me, I can almost see him smiling by the tone of his dark voice. "I will let your lost herd of sheep go ... only if you give me what is mine."   
  
Big Mamma glares at him. "He is not owned by you or anyone else, Zaha Torte!"   
  
Who are they talking about? So, the creepy soul sucking sorcerer has a name after all. Zaha Torte. Why does it sound so familiar? Why does everything seem so damn familiar?! And why the hell can't I remember any of it?!  
  
Lost in my thoughts, that's when I lose my footing while leaning against the door, stumbling noisily into the room and grabbing everyone's attention. Attention I didn't want. Catching myself from falling flat on my face, I look up to see their expressions. Big Mamma looks shocked and horrified, the Haz Knights tense, and the smile that I had pictured on the sorcerer's face got wider.   
  
"Once again you are wrong, Great Holy Mother," Zaha Torte says mockingly. "Carrot Glace belongs to me."  
  
  
  
***************  
  
Chapter Three  
  
***************  
  
  
Violet eyes are on me the moment I wake again. Once I see the owner of those eyes, I scream and try to get away. The problem is, my naked body doesn't want to move as it's pinned down by another body ontop of me . Wait a second... *my* naked body?! Slowly, I tear my gaze away from his and take in the fact that he's not wearing anything else either. My cheeks begin to glow with a red blush as blood rushes to them and down between my legs where my arousal is beginning to stir awake. Oh God.  
  
He leans over me, dark hair brushes against my skin as his lips are millimeters away from mine. Unlike the time at the Inn, the kiss is ensnaring and long, forcing his tongue down my throat as if he wants me to swallow it. His hands are busy too, one threaded through my short black hair while the other is wandering down my stomach to my .... Oh God...Oh God!  
  
I cry out into his mouth while trying to jerk my hips away as his hand closes around me. He pulls his head back, eyes narrowed in silent amusement, and runs a tongue across his warm lips. Breathing heavily as my eyes scan around the room, and I wonder what happened to Big Mamma and the Haz Knights. They aren't there, I'm terrified and relieved at the same time. But, we are no longer in that room ... nor the church. No ... we are ... we are ... back on the mountain. No, not the place where we met, that mountain was destroyed  
didn't have stone pillars.  
  
The sound of crackling fire is close by, and he's laying on top of me like that night. But now, he is awake, there are no twinkling stars in the sky and most important: we are both fully naked. His larger frame is pressing me firmly against the soft ground. Soft ... too soft. I look over to the side and notice that it's not the rocky and dirt covered ground we're on, but a bed. Okay ... nudity, a man on top of you, and a bed ... there's something wrong with this picture - all of it's wrong!  
  
"Get off me!" I finally shout after finding my voice.  
  
The amusement on his face doesn't waver. "And why should I do that?" he asks, removing his hand from my groin, to my relief. "I believe you liked the feeling of me against you..."  
  
"I ... I ... I didn't!" I can't see my face, but I know it is glowing red.  
  
"Children shouldn't lie to their elders," he says, glaring a little. "Servants should be punished for lying to their masters..."  
  
I forget the position I'm in for a mere second to scream out my rage. "I'm not your servant, you creep! I don't have 'property of evil sorcerer' on my back!"  
  
He smiles, "Have you checked your lips?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
An evil grin spreads across his face before he leans his head back down to kiss me again.  
  
'You are mine.'  
  
I let out a loud gasp, and my eyes widen in fear as my legs are parted around his middle. Oh God ... not this! Not with this man! Heart banging against my chest, my vision is awash with red. I'm screaming my lungs out now, thrashing against his grip and flailing my arms around wildly. Strong hands pin my shoulders to the bed, and I lose it. Bearing my teeth like some ferocious, blood thirsty animal, I use my fingers to claw at his face and bring my legs up to kick him in his rip cage. A surprised gasp is torn from his throat  
when he is shoved backwards away from me, then I pounce ready to kill...  
  
  
********  
  
  
"CARROT!"  
  
I blink and the image of Zaha Torte and that dark and unfamiliar place shatters like glass. White light fills my vision, melting away the red. I find myself simply staring at the stranger who is sitting at the foot of the bed I am sleeping in. Huh? The bed I am still sleeping in? Was it all just a dream? I blink a few more times, looking around the familiar room where I was sleeping at the Church. I'm wearing my clothes, and there's no dark sorcerer in sight. He's not here ... it was just a nightmare ... another  
twisted fucking ... uhh, wrong choice of words. Then, I start to shake while beginning to hyperventilate, and my eyes start to water. What the hell is happening to me?!  
  
Strong arms encircle my trembling form, and a gentle hand rubs the back of my head. Having no control over my own body, my face buries itself in long locks of beautiful emerald hair. A choked sob escapes my throat while I spill uncontrollable tears to soak into the fabric of his shirt.  
  
"Shhh," the stranger murmurs into my ear while rubbing soothing circles across my back. "It's all right, it was only a nightmare, Carrot. It's okay."  
  
He begins to assure me with comforting words that my ears seem to drown out.  
My mind just blanks. It's pretty easy to do. Just simply stare ahead at nothing, think nothing, feel nothing. Just shut everything out.  
  
Blank, blank, blankety, blank.  
  
Several minutes filled with blankness later, the taller man pushes me back gently to see my blank stare. He frowns ... where have I seen those aqua colored eyes before? And those crimson lips? Why is he wearing lipstick anyway? Is that a bow in his hair?  
  
"Carrot," He shakes me a little. "Talk to me."  
  
Talk to you? I don't even know you ... I don't know anything anymore.  
  
"Who...?" I ask, wincing as my voice cracks.  
  
"Milphey Yu, a fellow worker for Big Mamma," he answers, reaching back to the night stand and handing me a glass of water.  
  
Water...?  
  
[ "An exchange ... you leave that hot babe to me and I'll get you all the water you want." ]  
  
My muscles turn to jelly and the glass nearly falls out of my hand, but for the stranger...er Milphey. His eyes soften as he helps me drink while I curse my weakness. This guy looks way too girly and very familiar. There's that word again: familiar. Something I should know but can't remember. I think I hate that word.  
  
Realization hits me like Tira's mallet. Before falling asleep the first time at the church, my vision was filled with white ... the same when I awoke from my freaky realistic nightmare. White, the color of purity ... the color of the armor belonging to the leader of Big Mamma's Haz Knights! This guy ... this guy is ...!  
  
"Feeling better now?" he asks, smiling pleasantly while retrieving the empty glass. "You've slept throughout the day, and I came to wake you for dinner."  
  
"Dinner?" I croak. Didn't Dotta tell me the same thing? Or was that part of the dream too? My brain hurts ... "Are the others back yet?"  
  
"No," he answers, standing up from the bed. "But they did complete their mission without much difficulty. I believe you will see them tomorrow when they return to the church."  
  
"Tomorrow?" Why do I feel like a stupid parrot? "Are you sure everything is okay? How come they're not coming back tonight?"   
  
"Because it's almost midnight," says Milphey, "It's late, and they're probably exhausted after their case."  
  
I feel slightly guilty about this. They're out there stopping evil, and I'm here crying like a baby from some bad dream. A hand reaches out towards me, and I follow it towards the Haz Knight's comforting smile.  
  
"You must be hungry," he says, "Please, join me for dinner."  
  
Nodding numbly, I slip my hand into his.  
  
  
********  
  
"Here you go, Carrot, more sugar this time - just the way you like it."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
Dotta, who is still up at this late hour, happily serves me a third cup of coffee. She has even gone to the trouble of preparing my favorite foods, and it makes me feel even guiltier that I only ate a couple bites. Normally, I would be wolfing down the delicious home cooked meal in minutes ... but I am feeling far from 'normal' these miserable days and nightmare filled nights.  
  
It's not as if I'm starving, I am practically drooling over the food, it's just that eating too much makes you sleepy. After my dream - correction: nightmare - of Zaha in bed with me ... I don't think I ever want to fall asleep again. So now, I am drinking down coffee instead of wine, feeling more awake than ever ... at least I think I'm awake this time...or this is just part of another dream.   
  
"Want some dessert, Carrot?" asks Dotta as she collects my barely touched dinner and frowns on it. "It's Devil's chocolate cake and chocolate chip ice cream."  
  
Sweets sound appealing, but then I get this flash of me running around the church with a huge sugar high and annoying the hell out of everyone. A lot of running around would tire me out quickly ... so ... "No thanks, Dotta."  
  
The winged girl nearly drops the stack of plates she is carrying while staring at me with wide cat-like eyes. "Carrot, are you okay?! You're not acting like yourself! I know you were injured a lot the past few days but ... you're not dying, are you?!"  
  
I almost want to laugh. Dying? Me? I sort of wish I was. I'm acting and thinking strangely. I found out that I may be attracted to men, and I'm having scary dreams of a sorcerer who wants to kill me. Nope, I'm not dying ... just going insane. Milphey clears his throat after taking a sip of his wine, then looks over to Dotta who is gaping at me openly.  
  
She catches the look of disapproval on the Haz Knight's face and flutters out of the dining room to wash the dishes. I take another gulp of coffee, not caring that it's steaming hot and burns going down. The extra caffeine and sugar make me feel energetic enough that I want to run around the entire Spooner Continent looking for pretty women ... hell, even pretty men ...I just need to get out of here and do something before I explode!  
  
Smiling widely, I bounce out of my chair - yes, bounce - and on to my feet. "WellI'mgonnagonowlater!"  
  
"Wait, where are you going?" asks Milphey. I'm halfway out the door in seconds.  
  
Spinning around on my heel so fast that I almost fall over, I turn to face him. Where am I going? Oh, that's right ... I'm going out to ... uh. "Out to get some fresh air," I say a little slower this time. Am I hopping up and down? The Haz Knight gives me a comical expression before rising out of his seat.  
  
"Mind if I join you?"  
  
"Sure! Sure!" I wave impatiently. "Let's go!"  
  
I briefly wonder why this guy wants to hang around with me, especially when I'm in my crazy sugar rush mood. Did Big Mamma ask him to? Or is he hanging out with me because he wants to? All questions seem to disappear from my mind when we step outside of Stellar Church.  
  
"Nice night, ne?" I ask, looking over my shoulder to see him staring at the stars.  
  
He nods in agreement. "Yes."  
  
The stars aren't twinkling like they had been that night on the mountain. They seem dim and far away, almost invisible in the darkness. The cool breeze makes me shiver a little before the sugar in my blood acts up again, reminding me that I'm still in hyper mode. I have the sudden urge to jump into ice cold water again.  
  
Milphey clears his throat. "Carrot?"  
  
"Yeah?" I look around the dark forests surrounding the church and wonder if there is a pond or a lake nearby.  
  
"Do you remember the nightmare you had today?" he asks, brushing curly aqua bangs from his eyes, "Could you tell me about it?"  
  
I turn my gaze away from him so he can't see the deep scarlet blush on my face. Sure, I'll tell you! I was dreaming about having sex with one of our enemies...wanna go swimming? I don't think either Milphey or Big Mamma will like that. They'll probably think I'm infatuated or something...or just insane.  
  
"Sorry," I say after a few minutes. "I was trying to remember but I can't..."  
  
"I see," he says slowly, "How often do your nightmares happen?"  
  
Often? They never stop! Ever since I met that man, he's always in my dreams! Sometimes he trying to kill me, and sometimes ... he's doing other things. Things that make me shudder. But they're just dreams ... dreams can't kill you ... dreams can't rape you ... right?  
  
"Not often," I answer, shrugging my hands into my pockets. I just hope to God that the Haz Knight believes me and doesn't press further. "I'm ... uh ... I'm sorry I attacked you for waking me up."   
  
"That's all right," Milphey places a hand on my tense shoulder. "I was almost worried that you were going to transform."  
  
"Transform?" I blink. "I thought you Haz Knights knew that I can only transform after being hit by magic."  
  
He looks surprised for a moment until a small smile crosses his beautiful features. Look away, Carrot, you're blushing like a tomato again. "So you recognize me?"  
  
"Well, yeah," I shrug. "You're too pretty even covered up in all that armor..."  
  
I slap a hand over my mouth. God, did I just say that?! Did I - the babe hunter: Carrot Glace - just tell another man that he was pretty?! I look up at the sky to see if it's falling. Milphey just makes a small chuckle.  
  
"Thank you," He smiles. "I'm flattered."  
  
You're flattered?! I swallow hard and turn to face him, but not making eye contact. "I meant that you were pretty as a woman, and I wanted to ask you on a date or something before I passed out ... but now you ... you're ..."  
  
"I'm a man," he finishes with amusement clear in his voice. "I'm still flattered, and I wouldn't mind the date. However, my duties for our Holy Mother comes first."  
  
Well, that's a relief to know ... I like women ... I like women ...   
  
"Well, now that your hyperactivity has died down, perhaps we should head back inside..." Milphey turns slightly away from me.  
  
"Uh, you go on ahead," I tell him. "I'll just be out here for a few minutes more..."  
  
For some reason, I can tell that he wants to object for a minute but then simply nods and heads back into the Church. So, I'm alone again. Nothing new, even around my friends I am always alone. My friends, my family, the people I am closest to; hardly know me at all. They think I'm the lazy pervert I show off to the world; well, I guess that's what I want them to believe. Perhaps what I want myself to believe. I've worn this mask for so long that I don't even remember what I look like underneath. The mask is suffocating me now,  
and it feels like some unknown force is trying to rip it away...  
  
Yet again, I find myself thinking crazy thoughts. I miss the others ... I miss teasing Marron and Gateau about their relationship ... I miss angering Chocolate and Tira who then beat me to a pulp. Something wet rolls down my cheek. Is it a tear, am I actually crying now? No ... it's not a tear but a drop of rain. I blink as the distinct smell of rain fills my nostrils ... it's been raining for quite some time. My hair and most of my cloths are soaked through ... how long have I been standing out here?!  
  
Thick clouds have filled the sky, thunder and lightning will come soon. I should go back inside the shelter and warmth of Stellar Church. I should go find Big Mamma or Milphey and tell them about these strange feelings and dreams that are plagued by that man. But instead, I find my feet taking me elsewhere ... farther away from sanctuary.  
  
My steps seem to quicken when the simple pitter patter of rain becomes a shower that chills against my heated flesh. I break into the run when thunder strikes, and I'm running deeper into the dark woods while trying to avoid smacking into trees. Finally, I come to a stop at a dead end where boulders protrude above small pools of muddy water that ripple from the falling drops of rain.  
  
A couple of deep breaths later, my feet walk me over to one of those boulders to lean against. The rough surface is darkened and streaked by the moisture, and I couldn't care less as it tries to soak through my shirt. The black material must be water proof, but it doesn't save my other clothes nor myself from the cold chill.   
  
["Just because it has resistances doesn't mean it'll keep you immortal..."]  
  
The old crone's voice repeats itself in my mind as I bring a hand to my head and feel warmth. Oh great, now I'm coming down with a fever. Carrot Glace, you are the biggest moron that ever existed! I can actually see those very words written on my tombstone. Okay ... I really need to get back. My vision sort of blurs for a moment and when it clears I try to remember which path I had taken. Too bad every tree in this forest look identical to each other. Well, damn ... guess I'll have to try and find it.  
  
Too bad my body decides to shut down on me. I trip over my own feet and slam into something solid. A tree? Wait ... when did a trees generate warmth? When did trees start breathing heavily? My fingers dig into the bark which turns out to be grasps of dark fabric? Black cape ... this can't be Milphey, and last time I checked, the rest of the Haz Knights wore deep purple...so who is this?  
  
Looking up, my dazed brown eyes meet violet, and dread washes over me like the rain. "Were you waiting for me, Zaha Torte?"  
  
He smiles his insane, evil smile. "I have been waiting for thirteen years."  
  
My knees buckle with weakness, unable to support my weight any longer. I fall forward into his arms. He makes a noise of surprise before arms encircle me, pulling me into a warm embrace that feels ... ugh ... here's that word again: familiar. He's saying something else, but the heavy rainpour drown the words out, and I'm having difficulty keeping my eyes open. My head rests against his heart as a hand trails down the side of my torso ... this is a dream right? I know that this time it has to be.  
  
A hand tilts my chin up and lips conquer mine, taking over my mouth with his tongue. The arm encircled around my waist pulls me even closer as if to merge our two bodies together. My mind automatically goes blank once again, and I don't even realize that my own tongue is dueling against his. This is a dream right?  
  
Please....  
  
['You are mine.']  
  
...Someone, please wake me up.  
  
  
  
[ Author's Notes ]  
  
Yeah, I know Carrot's being an out-of-character whiny uke. I was in a rush to write this ... evil older sister is coming home for a week and taking over my computer ;_; Anyway, happy 4th of July everyone! 


	4. Chapter Four

Catharsis   
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
email: teno_hikari@yahoo.com / tenohikari@cs.com   
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story   
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte; Carrot  
Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or worse?  
  
Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the anime or read the manga for a few years.   
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.   
  
**********   
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
It seems what's left of my human side  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
violently it changes  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
-Disturbd 'Down with the sickness'   
  
**********   
  
  
It's a few hours past dawn when I finally stagger through the doors of Stellar Church and startle the small crowd of people waiting for me. Head spinning, I groggily try to keep balance as another body pounces onto me.  
Red fills my vision, a scarlet ... no, a blood red color. Blood. My stomach  
fills a little queasy as I look at the owner of that red hair.   
  
"DARLING!"   
  
I wince. Chocolate. Of course.   
  
"Where have you been?!" She demands angrily, nearly choking the life out of  
me, "Women chasing, I bet! Oh darling, you're such a jerk sometimes! I should  
put my hat on and ..."   
  
"Chocolate," Milphey Yu looks sternly at her, arms folded across the front of his pristine uniform. "Please, let Carrot explain."   
  
I would have walked over and given the Haz Knight a big kiss on the lips. I would have ... if it hadn't been for the fact that I'm not 'that' way. At least I don't think I am. Well, I sort of am, but only a little. Ow...brain hurts. Taking a deep breath as Chocolate releases me from her bone crushing grip, I survey the people around me.   
  
Tira is fuming silently next to Gateau, who is cracking his knuckles. Definitely not a good sign. Marron is trying his best not to break down into a fit. Milphey looks expectantly towards me, and I nod, swallowing hard.   
  
"I was out last night, walking around," My voice trails off to redheaded Sorcerer Hunter whose blue eyes are narrowed dangerously. Uh, oh. "No girl chasing, I swear!"   
  
Both Misu sisters give me disbelieving looks but decide not to pound me into  
the ground ... yet. "Anyway," I continue, looking at Milphey. "I got lost  
while wandering through the woods ... it started raining so I found shelter   
for the night."   
  
Yes, it was raining. I remember it clearly, the rain and the dark gray clouds they poured from. There was lightening, and I was freezing my ass off. Later on, I remember being warm and dry in a dark place. "A cave," I say after a few more seconds of recollecting my thoughts. "I must have taken shelter in a cave nearby and then ... I guess I fell asleep."   
  
"You don't remember?" asks Marron, who is staring at my slightly damp clothes and tousled hair. "Did something happen?"   
  
"Naw, caught a little cold, but I'm all better now!" I try to smile, seeing  
that worried look on my little brother's face. The truth is, I don't remember much of what happened last night. What I am telling them now ... isn't exactly the truth but not necessarily a lie. I mean ... it can't be either since I don't recall anything. Ouch ... brain's hurting again.   
  
"It stopped raining around noon," says Gateau, "Why didn't you come back then?"   
  
"Noon?" I stare uncertainly at the older Sorcerer Hunter. "I just came back a couple of hours after sunrise. What are you guys doing here so early anyway?"   
  
Everyone starts looking at me as if I have just told them the sky is now polka-dotted pink. "What?"   
  
"Carrot, it's an hour after sunset," says Milphey.   
  
"What?!" I shout unbelievingly. "You're kidding me! What are you trying to say? That a whole day flew by, and I didn't even notice?"   
  
"Darling," Chocolate reaches out to touch my forehead. "You said you were sick. Maybe you were hallucinating?"   
  
"Either that or you smashed your head against a rock," suggests Gateau. A startled look crosses their faces as I find myself glaring. Reaching up, I  
smooth back the dark bangs from my face, then bow my head to show them that I don't have a head injury of any kind.   
  
"I wasn't hallucinating!" I shout hysterically. Why am I shouting hysterically? They're probably right, and I'm just really, really, really   
out of it. But no, there is this small nagging feeling at the back of my head. I want to kick it, if it is possible. Clenching my fists at my sides, I  
try to piece through my shattered memory and put it back together. "It was  
dark ...I remember it getting dark and there was a light. I saw the sunrise  
and then I came here."   
  
"You said you were lost," Tira points out. "How did you find your way back  
after being lost all night?"   
  
All night... I was gone all night. In a dark place, I remember my skin felt  
both hot and cold at the same time. Shivering and sweating at the same time.  
There was a light in the darkness... a light that kept flickering on and  
off. "I...," I trail off while knitting my brow. I try to piece through the  
puzzle but have a hard time making anything fit. "I don't remember."   
  
"Darling?"   
  
"Don't worry about it," says Milphey as he steps forward and places a hand  
on my shoulder. "You're exhausted and should be resting like you're supposed  
to."   
  
I groan and slap my forehead. Big Mamma ordered me to stay at the Church and  
rest. So what do I do? Go running off into the rain, catch a cold, and cause  
everyone else to worry ... very responsible of me. Sighing, I nod my head in  
silent agreement.   
  
"Darling, you look tired," purrs Chocolate as she latches onto my arm. "Let's go to bed together."   
  
"Chocolate, stop it!" Tira shouts, her glasses steaming up. "Carrot needs his rest and none of ... of that!"   
  
"Aaww," the elder sister whines as she releases my arm. "Well, rest up, darling! We have to report to Big Mamma, and if you're not too tired we could have dinner later!"   
  
"Sure," I yawn. "Sounds great. I'll see you guys later."   
  
Turning away as they walk to the main hall, I am surprised to see that the Haz Knight is still standing there. Why? Why isn't he protecting Big Mamma like the others? Why is he starring at my throat? Feeling more uncomfortable by the minute, I head back to the room I had slept in. I hope to get a good night's sleep this time.   
  
I remove my shirt and toss it over to the armchair, missing it completely, before collapsing onto the bed. I've just made a total idiot out of myself.  
Okay, it's not hard to do, and I do it often, so my friends are pretty used  
to it. However, a part of me wants to leave a good impression for the Haz  
Knight after my craziness the other day. He may look like a girl, but his  
position and power commands respect from all of us little people.   
  
When training to be Sorcerer Hunters, we dreamed of being Haz Knights.  
Especially Marron and I, since both our parents were Haz Knights in their  
younger days. Marron would make a good Haz Knight with his knowledge of  
Eastern Magic, his intelligence, his bravery and his composure. Correction,  
Marron wouldn't make a good Haz Knight, he would be the perfect one. The  
one my parents would always be proud of.   
  
Especially our father. My eyes narrow wearily as I pull the covers over  
my body. I try not to be jealous over the fact that Pop loved Marron more  
than me. In both our eyes, my little brother could do no wrong. I, on the  
other hand, am a walking disaster waiting to happen. Pop looked at me as if  
I wasn't there ... and he'd even treat his adopted daughters more like kin  
than he did his eldest son. Even though I'll never admit it out loud, I'm  
jealous.   
  
Pretending not to care, I keep telling myself that Onion Glace was a sorry  
excuse for both a father and Haz Knight. Unfortunate for me that I ended up  
adopting his lazy and perverted traits. During the old days, I respected and  
loved one man like a father way more than my biological one. He was a wonderful father, all the other children would agree, and an excellent Haz  
Knight. He was someone I looked up to and admired. Someone who promised to  
train me to be like him, he ... he... he doesn't have a name. I can't  
remember it. Wonderful. The man I idolized as a child, and I can't even  
remember his name! Nice way of honoring a dead man. I'm such an idiot...   
  
Absently, I rub my throat; there's some kind of bruise there that's just irritating me. Probably a bug bite, I was sleeping outside in the forest. What was weird is that the bite wasn't itchy ... just annoying. Weird how I didn't feel the throbbing soreness until now. Weird, how it didn't feel like a bug bite ... more like teeth marks. That seems to be the keyword of the day: weird.   
  
  
  
***************   
  
Chapter Four   
  
***************   
  
  
I end up sleeping peacefully throughout the night and well into the morning.  
Instead Chocolate nearly gives me a heart attack by she slipping into my bed  
and waiting for me to wake up. So, you could say I have a normal morning. At breakfast, everything is back to the way it used to be. Chocolate is trying to force-feed me my eggs, Tira is fuming as she watches us while Marron and Gateau observe with amused expressions while playing footsies under the table.   
  
  
"Good morning, everyone!" Dotta makes her cheerful entrance, hovering in the  
air above us.   
  
"Well, it's good now," I grin, tilting my head to the side so I could look up her dress. Well, she is hovering right above me ... so why not? A few seconds later, I find myself sprawled on the floor. My head is throbbing where both Misu sisters malleted me. Oh, that's 'why not' ...   
  
"Big Mamma wants to brief all of you now for your new cases," says the winged messenger.   
  
"Cases?" Marron repeats. "She's assigning us more than one?"   
  
"She'll explain it all herself," answers Dotta, who then looks over to where I lie. "I'm glad you're back to normal, Carrot. Feeling better?"   
  
I just groan in response as Tira scrapes me off the floor.   
  
  
**********   
  
Once again the serious expression on Big Mamma's face slowly dissolves when  
we enter the room. She's smiling at us, and from the corner of my eye I see the Haz Knights assembled as well, but Milphey isn't there. That's odd, the leader of the Haz Knights was always ...   
  
"Hello, Carrot."   
  
I jump about ten feet into the air when a hand reaches out to pat my shoulder. Spinning around, Milphey stands behind me, dressed without his  
uniform and with an alarmed but amused look on his face. What freaks me out  
is the fact that I have the best hearing on the team, and I didn't even hear  
him come up behind me.   
  
"I'm sorry I startled you," he apologizes.   
  
"Uh," I swallow hard as I try and think up something intelligent to say. However, the blow to the head a few minutes ago might have actually done   
some brain damage. Assuming my brain hadn't left me already. Then again, I'm  
never good at this sort of thing. Thankfully, Dotta starts speaking and saves me from making a bigger fool out of myself by stuttering nonsense.   
  
Pull yourself together, Sorcerer Hunter. It's time act serious. No, not act   
but 'be' serious about this case. I straighten up and concentrate on what  
Dotta and Big Mamma are saying while ignoring the glances the others are giving me.   
  
My eyes lock on to the image of our newest target: Viscount Taltmut, a magic  
engineer. What the hell is a magic engineer? Okay, the name says it all but  
I'm still clueless. The guy is pretty good looking, pale skin and silver hair - gaahhhh! What the hell is happening to me?!   
  
"Magic engineer?" I find myself speaking out, trying to keep focused on the  
case and not my own twisted problems.   
  
"What's that?" asks Gateau.   
  
"We all know that during the history of war, several Kinju and magical weapons were created," explains Big Mamma. "The magic engineers are the ones  
who designed all the kinju."   
  
Knew I should have studied more in my Sorcerer Hunter history class. Turns out these magic engineers and their Kinju caused a lot of destruction as well as deaths during the war. Some really dangerous people you didn't want to piss off ... kinda like some ladies I know. Anyway, after the war these powerful magic engineers were collared to seal off their power and become  
helpless little bunnies. However, one of them - our target Taltmut - is now  
free. So let's do the math: helplessly collared magic engineer minus collar  
equals powerful and very pissed off magic engineer. Yeah, that sounds about  
right.   
  
"So, now Viscount Taltmut can begin creating new Kinju?" asks Tira.   
  
Chocolate, who is practically piercing my personal space, is now staring at   
the collar around Taltmut's throat. "After all the trouble we've gone through to seal them..."   
  
"If any new Kinju are created and spread out across the world, it could result in another war," Gateau says sullenly. Unsealed Magic Engineer plus  
new kinju equals lots of trouble.   
  
"That is why we must stop him," Milphey says, taking a step forward. "His  
power must be sealed one way or another."   
  
"Another" meaning death, since I bet Taltmut would rather die than be  
humiliated by wearing a collar once again. Wait a minute ... "'We'?" I say,  
staring at the Haz Knight. "You're coming with us?"   
  
"I have asked Milphey Yu to assist you on this mission, my Sorcerer Hunters," says Big Mamma. "In case Viscount Taltmut has created a Kinju already. It is possible he has assistance that Milphey will take care of."   
  
More magic engineers? Oh, wonderful! In that case why don't the rest of the  
Haz Knights come along? The emerald haired man gives me a small reassuring  
smile before his eyes lower a little to look at my throat. Swallowing hard,  
I let my gaze lower to the small bite mark that was mostly hidden under my  
shirt. He was staring at it the other day ... now that I'm looking at it in  
the light, the bite does look like teeth marks. Resisting the urge to shiver, I pull the collar of my shirt up and turn to leave with the others after we're dismissed.   
  
  
**********   
  
"So, any ideas how we're going to nail this guy?" Gateau askes as we make our way to the city that Taltmut resides in. It won't be a city much longer if we don't stop the Magic Engineer. If we can stop him.   
  
"Maybe we can try and seal his power again," suggests Chocolate, who points  
to the gold collar in my hands. Milphey had given it to us before we parted  
ways. Somehow, I don't think we'll be needing it.   
  
"If we can get close to him that is," says Marron. "If not, then we have no  
other alternative than to..."   
  
My brother's voice trails off as we hear explosions coming from the city. Seems like our target is throwing himself a party. Well, if we're lucky, it  
will be his last. Hopefully, he'll blast me before he can hurt the others.   
  
[ "I don't care what happens to me if I can protect them!" ]   
  
What was that? Who said that just now? Am I hearing voices too?! That's it,  
I'm checking myself into a mental inst....   
  
"CARROT, MOVE YOUR ASS!"   
  
Well, it's back to reality I go.   
  
"I'm movin'! I'm movin!" I shout back, running to catch up with the others. Really, I gotta stop zoning out like this. The worst feeling in the  
world is when one of my friends get injured whenever I do something stupid.  
But not this time.   
  
The scent of ash and cinder fills my nostrils as we approach the city that  
is cloaked with flames. Along with the smell of burning flesh that also  
permeates the air, befouling my senses. I know I'm not in the right frame of  
mind when I start thinking like Marron. A sudden sickness washes over me,   
and it feels like my stomach is trying to escape through my throat.   
  
How many? How many people has this bastard killed already? Everything moves  
quickly, and I see a streak of red light flash in the sky before the ground  
rumbles beneath us. I end up falling on my ass, but go directly into a roll  
to absorb most of the shock of the fall. Back on my feet once more, my eyes  
narrow and scan the surrounding area. He's close, my keen hearing has picked  
up the sound of laughter. The only one who would laugh at this destruction  
is the person who caused it.   
  
I follow my instincts and am a bit surprised to see that the others are now  
following me. The laughter gets louder as we reach the top of a concrete wall that surveys most of the burning city. My teeth grind silently together as I spot our target standing out in the open. The magic engineer is still laughing while admiring his handy work. Bastard. I'll think of better insults after he's dead.   
  
  
"A true Magic Engineer controls the power of destruction and the Kinju!" he  
says with a gleeful laugh.   
  
Another streak of red, and I find myself shuddering. Wear have I seen this  
power before? I want to observe the magic engineer more, to see where he's  
drawing his new source of magic fromm, but the others want to interrupt. Oh   
well, I guess it doesn't matter, because he's going to die. No sorcerer has ever stood a chance against my Zoanthropy form.   
  
"You might want to stop while you're ahead," Chocolate tells him.   
  
"You can still go back," adds Tira.   
  
I doubt their words, and I'm sure he does as well. Taltmut turns around to  
face us, and we see the gleam of power in his eyes and the hatred of the object I hold my hands. No, he won't turn back. Not as long as he thirsts  
for power. Once you have it ... once you've walked the road to ruin, there is no turning back.   
  
"So you finally came, Sorcerer Hunters," he says, practically spitting out the last part while crimson eyes narrow at the five of us. "To end my existence?"   
  
"No, duh," I mutter under my breath. I almost freeze when the Magic Engineer  
looks directly at me and then to the spinning collar seal around my finger.   
  
"Your power, if left ignored, will lead to more devastation," Tira says,  
gesturing to the fiery scene before us.   
  
"If you let us seal it," says Chocolate, "We'll let you go."   
  
I frown at those words, actually hoping he will turn down our offer. Not that I want to fight the crazy Sorcerer, but he shouldn't be able to walk away after all the hell he's caused. Funny, I've never wanted to kill a man before, until now.   
  
"And why should I ask for your forgiveness?" He says with a glare. Those  
eyes are then focused on the seal in my hand, and I let out a loud gasp as   
it shatters. I smile inwardly, having anticipated this and glad he didn't   
disappoint.   
  
  
"You're the ones who shall be punished," Taltmut says boldly. "I'll show you  
the power of a true Magic Engineer. I haven't used this Kinju in a while,  
but let's call this a warm-up. Hope you Sorcerer Hunters are up for playing."   
  
I don't like the sound of that. Just blast me already so I can stomp you into a bloody pulp! He snaps his fingers, and the wall we're on begins to rumble noisily. We scatter away, wondering what trick our target was up to until something emerges from the earth.   
  
What the hell? What's he pulling up from the ground? Whatever it is was taking shape of a ... a ...   
  
"A stone golem," Marron says as both he and Gateau stand together. They really do make a cute couple. Dammit, Carrot! Now isn't the time of having  
thoughts about walking Marron down a wedding aisle!   
  
Before I know it, the two Misu sisters have already changed forms and are ready to put this Magic Engineer out of our misery. Great, now I have to let them deal with the jumbo sized pet rock until Taltmut decides to use his  
magic on me. Sometimes I feel like I should just strap a target to myself  
with an arrow saying 'aim magic here.' I guess the best chance I've got is  
just pissing him off with a surprise attack. Heh, that's something I'm good  
at. Er, pissing people off, that is.   
  
Sneaking my way over to him, I can hear the Sorcerer laugh and gloat at my  
friends' pathetic attempts against his Kinju. I'll have to remember to make  
sure he screams as I crush the life out of him. Maybe I'll peel away his flesh, strip the marrow from his bones and ... why am I thinking?! Focus, I  
need to focus ... I'm closer and he'll never see me coming...   
  
"Your fellow Sorcerer Hunters are pathetic," He says before looking straight  
at me. So much for my little surprise attack. Now, I just hope I can piss him  
off.   
  
"You want to know what's even more pathetic?" I ask, my eyes narrowing. "You. Your power hungry and childish actions are the reason why you were collared like a mutt in the first place!"   
  
His lips twist into a sneer while his eyes burn with anger. Mission ccomplished. I get ready to be hit by his magic spell, but the ground underneath my feet splits open, sending me flying back. Dammit, I didn't  
count on this! Slammed into the wall, I slump to the ground and watch him  
slowly advance like a hunter would stalk his prey. I am sooo screwed.   
  
A hand clamps down on the back of my neck and raises my head off the ground.  
Damn... he's smiling. A groan escapes my throat as I'm shoved up against the  
wall that I had hit a few moments ago. I see a glimmer of a smile on his lips before pain stabs through my shoulders. He's embedded sharp spikes into them, stone spikes that go through my flesh to scrape into the wall behind me. Now glistening crimson. Blood ... that's my blood spilling down the front of my body.   
  
He takes a step closer, anger gone from his face, and now he just looks amused. Dazed at the slowly numbing pain running up and down my arms, my brain slowly analyzes the situation I'm in. I'm literally pinned to a wall  
that's away from my friends, so they can't see what's going on. Nimble fingers are trying to rip open the front of my shirt. Oh God ... please don't tell me he's gonna... I would like to scream, if it didn't feel like someone had reached in and tore out my vocal cords.   
  
  
**********   
  
  
For several minutes my brain just seems to have been switched to the off mode. It is either that, or it probably got fed up with me for not listening, and decided to call it quits. I don't blame it ... probably exchanged places with a vegetable. Heh, maybe a carrot ... so Carrot now has a carrot for a brain. okay ... am I on drugs? It is when I'm submerged into ice cold water that I seem to wake up from my trance. My body tenses and tries to move, but firm hands pin me down into the porcelain bath tub. Staring up at the man holding me down, my teeth are chattering from both the cold and fear, while I try to squirm out of his grip.   
  
"It's cold!" I manage to say. Shaking while clinging on to him, I wish I had  
the strength to climb out. He just looks down at me with an unreadable expression on his face.   
  
"Of course," he says finally with a bit of impatience. "It's supposed to be  
in order to lower your fever. Now calm down."   
  
It's when I actually hear his voice and see a mysterious glimmer in his eyes  
that I come into full awareness. This is a dream. Repeat, this is a dream  
... please, God...let this be another dream I'll wake up from. The ice cold  
water that stabs like a thousand nails tells me not to count on my prayers. This is real. I'm really naked in a tub of freezing water, and he's here sitting by the side while looking right into my terror-filled eyes. Reality sucks.   
  
It's also kinda hot. Fever? Oh, right ... being out in the rain that long was bound to make me sick. So I'm sick, naked, and in the enemy's evil lair ... the only thing to make this even worse is...   
  
"Your eyes," Zaha Torte nods toward me. "They're beautiful."   
  
Nevermind.   
  
I can't seem to think of anything intelligent to say. I swallow hard, wincing as it feels like I'm swallowing sand. So, I'm just looking at him as if he were speaking some foreign language, while trying to inch back away and cover my nudity. A small smile tugs at his lips as he reaches out to capture my jaw, making me wince.   
  
Okay, this guy has me completely freaked out. Way worse than Chocolate and  
Tira together on their 'time of the month'. In my desperate attempt to put  
distance between us, I manage to slip out of his grip ... and completely  
into the water. My situation does not improve as I accidentally take a  
breath of water. My arms are seized roughly in a strong grip before he hauls  
me up to sit upright in the bath so I can hack, wheeze, and then breathe  
once again.   
  
"You are an idiot," he informs me as I continue to sputter. "I told you to  
calm down."   
  
"Let me go!" I hiss. It occurs to me now that he has my arms pinned to my sides, leaving me unable to cover myself while in cool and *clear* water. If  
this is a nightmare, it's the worse one I've ever had. Way worse than my nightmare of me marrying Gateau...ick.   
  
"Why?" he asks, "If I let you go you'll drown, and I need you alive, Carrot  
Glace."   
  
"Need me for what, you creep?!" I demand. I am trying not to blush, but am already failing at that due to the fever. Beads of perspiration run down my throat as he leans closer, his breath warm against my heated flesh. In vain,  
I find myself trying to pull away until my back comes in contact with the cool surface that is the edge of the bath tub.   
  
"You weren't afraid of me before, but you certainly are now," he says, ignoring my constant attempts to struggle out of the tub, splashing water  
everywhere. "I'm glad."   
  
"You're glad?!" I repeat in disgust.   
  
He just stares, a half smile on lips as he brushes them against mine. I have the urge to head butt him, but I'd probably do more damage to myself. Considering the fact that I accidentally banged his head against some huge rocks, and he turned out to be just fine. Shivering and pressed against the porcelain tub, I try to put on my best courageous face and bite my lower lip to keep it from trembling.   
  
"What ... do ... you ... want."   
  
The half teasing smile becomes a full one, and I think my heart must have burst free from my chest and run out the door. Hands wrap around my shoulders and pull me out of the bathtub to straddle his lap. I think I prefer the freezing water. Zaha's violet gaze narrows slightly as he tilts his head to the side and looks like he is considering something. I can almost hear the thoughts running through his head: 'shall I rape him and then kill him ... or kill him first?' ...neither appealed to me.   
  
"What do you want?" I ask again, clenching my teeth to stop them from chattering.   
  
His hand runs through the dark and damp mass of my hair before grasping tightly and pulling my head back. I'm lost for breath at the sudden pain, my  
eyes widen as I stare up at the ceiling and catch sight of several candles.  
Swallowing hard as his breath touches my exposed throat, I stare into the  
flickering candlelight. Pulse hammering under my skin, I squeeze my eyes  
shut as something hard rakes against my neck. A knife? No, it doesn't feel  
like metal...is it teeth? It has to be ... and he's muttering something I can't understand. I don't understand any of this.   
  
  
"I want back what belongs to me," he says finally, after several seconds.   
  
My eyes burn with tears at the pain caused by his teeth sinking into the flesh of my throat. Real. This is real and both the coppery scent and warm  
trickle down my neck is really blood. He's talking in a low voice again,  
whispers in my ear that I can't distinguish. His words float around in my subconscious before he releases his grip from my hair. One by one, each candle in the bathroom is snuffed, plunging the room into darkness.   
  
**********   
  
"He was right," Taltmut purred against my ear, making me shudder. "Fear does  
bring out beauty in you, Sorcerer Hunter."   
  
"He?" I choke out, barely getting my voice to work.   
  
The silver-haired Magic Engineer grins before casting his eyes over the wall I am up against to observe the others. "'Kill the Sorcerer Hunters and you will receive the power of he who is closest to God' was the deal he made  
me."   
  
I lean back to avoid the hands that have given up on opening the shirt and  
are at belt buckle of my pants. Not caring that I am impaling myself further against those stone spikes. I didn't even know blood was streaming  
from the corner of my mouth until I try to speak. "However, he gave me specific instructions to keep you alive."   
  
"Me?" I gurgle. Am I dying? It certainly feels like I am.   
  
"You'll live through this, Sorcerer Hunter," He grins. "But I did say that  
I would punish the Sorcerer Hunters ... and I meant all of you."   
  
It is when his lips descend on my mouth that I let out a scream, and in the   
back of my mind I can hear him laugh. Both he and Taltmut are laughing. No, I'm not going to let this happen! Not again!   
  
'Kill them'   
  
A voice echoed, taking control of my fears.   
  
'Kill them all.'   
  
  
[ Author's Notes ]   
  
Feedback? Please? 


	5. Chapter Five

Catharsis  
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
email: teno_hikari@yahoo.com / tenohikari@cs.com  
- Pre-read by: Sarryn  
- Beta-read by: Bluepard  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story  
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte; Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or worse?  
Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the anime or read the manga for a few years.  
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.  
  
EXTRA NOTE FOR THIS CHAPTER: non-con / NC-17 with a recollection of Rape.  
  
  
**********  
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
It seems what's left of my human side  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
violently it changes  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
-Disturbed 'Down with the sickness'  
  
**********  
  
  
What a weird dream...  
  
  
Big Mama once told me that dreams are the language of the soul. They comment on the aspects of our lives. I think I was about ten years old when Mama told me this, and I didn't have a clue on what she was saying. Of course, Marron and the other understood then. I was probably wondering what kind of underwear Dotta was wearing. Yes, I was a big pervert even back then.  
  
Sitting up in bed, I stretch my limbs and let out a loud yawn. Man, I slept well ... and I'm beginning to really like it here at the Church. Okay, other than Big Mama and Dotta, there aren't many women around. Certainly some pretty men like Milphey ... dammit brain! I like women, so shut the hell up!  
  
I flop back down on the bed and wonder what time it is. Probably earlier than when I normally wake up, because Tira and Chocolate would already be dragging me out. Oh, well ... I guess I can sleep until the sisters barge in with their wake up call.  
  
Again, I wake up on my own ... or my growling inner God demands a sacrifice of...steak, eggs, bacon; and lots of it! Who am I to anger the almighty God of Hunger? All right ... all right ... I'm getting out of bed, stop bitching and let me put my pants on! Uhh... making sudden movements after sleeping that long is definitely not a good idea. My body feels really sore ...especially in a place that it ... um ... *shouldn't*. Ah hell ... I hope I wasn't sick enough to get constipated here at the Church. How embarrassing...  
  
My stomach growls loudly, threatening that if I don't feed it soon there will be hell to pay. I don't doubt it as I quickly pull on the rest of my clothes while ignoring the aches and pains. Stop being such a wuss, my pride tells me. I've been whipped constantly by two dominatrix sisters, struck by attack magic of all kinds, and beaten down by everyone and their mother - so this ache should be nothing!  
  
Walking to the dining area isn't 'nothing'. I'm practically ready to crawl on my hands and knees. By the time I get there, I want to go back to that comfortable bed and just sleep. Knowing me, I probably ate a whole feast and drank gallons of beer before making a complete ass of myself. That's probably why no one came to wake me ... looks like I have to cough up an apology before I can get some breakfast.  
  
The dining room becomes silent as the doors creak open upon my entrance. Sitting at the long table, my friends look up at me, their meals now  
forgotten. No 'good morning, Carrot (or darling, if it's Chocolate)' or 'finally joined the land of the living, huh?' They are all looking at me funny. Silence and funny looks. Bad sign.  
  
"Hey, guys." I greet them with a small smile and a nervous shrug. No reaction. Not good. "Uh ... good morning?"  
  
Well, at least I think it's morning. Casting a look to the half-eaten food on their plates, my stomach gets even more impatient. Looks like it's lunch time ... if I don't feed myself soon, I'm going to start eating the walls of this Church. Never mind that Big Mama would throw a 'mountain-destroying' fit.  
  
"Look, I ... about the mission last night..." I trail off to try and recall what happened. My memory is doing the scrambling thing again... I need to get a new one. "I'm sorry ... I know I screwed up and it won't happen again."  
  
Their blank stares turn into disbelieving ones. Okay, reeeaallly bad sign. I start to stutter that I didn't help at all and probably almost screwed up the whole mission. By now, my friends would have just shrugged and forgiven me but instead ... nothing. They all just blink and I find myself standing in a puddle of nervous sweat. How bad did I mess up this time?!  
  
"Come on guys," I urge them, shifting uncomfortably and ignoring the insistent wailing of my aching body. "Say something. I know what I did  
was stupid and I should have..."  
  
The sound of my little brother's fist hitting the table startles us all. Marron rises out of his seat and gives me an incredulous stare. Ah, shit. Marron's pissed off at me ... really pissed off ... which means I've done something reaaally bad. But how bad? I mean I didn't eat his boyfriend in my beast form, did I? No, the big jerk is still with us, sitting at Marron's side. Gateau and the girls still have that shocked expression on their faces, as if I had just announced that I've become a priest or...  
  
  
"Brother..."  
  
  
I jerk my head up, and Marron is now standing before me, his gaze intense as he lifts his hand up. For a moment I think he's going to slap me. So I brace myself and hope that I won't fall on my ass. Instead of hitting me, his arms wrap themselves around my body, drawing me into a near-crushing embrace.  
  
"M-Ma...rron?!" I manage to choke out. My shoulders ache all of a sudden, making my arms useless for trying to pry his arms loose. Something wet drops on my arm as Marron shudders against me. Is he ... is he crying?!  
  
"Marron! What is it? What's wrong?!"  
  
My little brother has never cried before! Not since mom and dad died ... not since that day when our village burned to the ground ... and ...  
  
"How could you?!" Marron cries into my wounded shoulder.  
  
How could I what? Was that an accusation? What the hell did I do to make him cry?! Okay ... Gateau is still here. Tira and Chocolate are still here. I'm not wearing a wedding ring (thank God) ... so ... what's up?  
  
"Marron..." I ignore the throbbing pain in my shoulders from his grip. "What's wrong?"  
  
"How could you think it was your fault?!" my brother demands, tears streaming down his face. Jeez ... I really can't stand to see him like this! Okay, if it wasn't my fault that the mission was screwed up ... then the mission hadn't been screwed up. That's good, right?  
  
"C'mon, little brother," I soothe him, gently dislodging his hands from my aching shoulders. What I did I do to get them, anyway? They feel strained, like I had been lifting heavy things for hours. "Now, if I'm off the hook... I would sure love something to eat ... man, I'm starving!"  
  
"Yay! Carrot's back to normal!" Dotta exclaims happily as she enters the  
room carrying a tray of food. I would kiss her, but I really don't need a whipping right now. Especially when I feel like this! I wonder if that stone golem kicked me in the ass ... certainly feels like it. "I heard you were injured really badly last night. But I guess everything is okay and..."  
  
"Dotta," my brother says sternly and gives her 'the look'. Okay, something is up with Marron when he gives out 'the look'. So what's 'the look' all about? It's a glare that silently threatens 'shut the hell up before I sick my pet phoenix on you to peck out your eyes'.  
  
  
The room is quiet again until my stomach protests angrily and noisily at the fact that I'm not wolfing down the food sitting in front of me. Right, food. So now I'm chewing away at the three-course meal Dotta has made for me. That's it, I think I'm going to go ask Big Mama if I can move into the Church.  
  
Now the silence is really getting to me as I watch everyone pick at his or her own food. They keep casting these nervous glances in my direction. What's wrong? Taking the last gulp of my ice tea, I set it down on the table, wipe my mouth clean and then fold my arms across my chest.  
  
"Okay, what's the matter?"  
  
Silence.  
  
"Come on!" I sit up impatiently and harden my expression. "What's the matter with you guys? If it wasn't my fault, then what is it?!"  
  
Tira, Chocolate, and Gateau stare at me, then stare at each other, and finally at Marron. My little brother is struggling to stay calm. I can tell because his hands are trembling. He catches my gaze and his hands drop into his lap. Oh, damn ... I did screw up!  
  
"Was it the Magic Engineer?" What the hell was his name? Viscount Tattle-mutt? I think it was something like ... ow ... my shoulders *really* hurt. "What did he do to me anyway?"  
  
"You don't remember?" Tira asks quietly from where she sits across the table from me. Her glasses slide down a little, exposing her overly concerned, ruby eyes. "You ... you really don't remember what happened?"  
  
"Well, if I did ... I wouldn't be asking," I reply carefully. Okay my stomach is full but my body is acting up and wants to crawl back into bed. "Did he get away?"  
  
"No," Marron answers with an icy amber glare. I wish he wouldn't do that, it makes me nervous. It was about ten times worse than 'the look' and I've only seen it when someone has me. Is that what happened? Is that why I feel so damn sore? "He's dead ... you made sure of it. But after seeing what he did to you, I wanted him to live ... I wanted to kill him slowly..."  
  
Gateau visibly flinches at the tone of his lover's voice. "Marron, calm down! Everything is fine ... Carrot's fine ... and that bastard won't hurt Carrot again."  
  
"HE DID MORE THAN 'HURT'!" Marron roars with a murderous look on his face that made us all back away. "HE RAPED MY BROTHER AND I..."  
  
The room goes silent once again as I feel a cold sweat run down my back. Wait ... hold on ... Marron said he ... the Magic Engineer r-r...raped...? Oh hell...! Why, oh WHY did I have to get out of bed?!  
  
I lean to the side of my chair and throw up.  
  
  
***************  
  
Chapter Five  
  
***************  
  
  
  
I hate being helpless ... well, I'm helpless when it comes to fighting sorcerers, but I hate being treated like a total invalid. Which is how my friends are treating me right now. For some reason Gateau believed I had lost the use of my legs and carried me from the dinning room back to my bedroom. I tried kicking and screaming, but my legs didn't feel like moving and my throat still felt sore after I'd lost my lunch. Poor Dotta had to clean it up off the floor.  
  
Tira and Chocolate changed the sheets even after I protested that they were fine. Apparently, I had been color blind when I woke up, because now the clean white sheets were dirty with dark red spots. Oh, God ... I think I'm about to get sick again!  
  
The girls leave as Marron carefully changes my clothes. Once he pulls my pants away, the stench of blood fills the air, and Gateau is quickly at my side with a wooden bucket in his hands. I would like to thank him ... but currently I'm not able to do so. So I thank Gateau after I finish revisiting lunch and am courteous enough not to speak directly at him. My breath doesn't exactly smell like roses petals at the moment.  
  
Laying back down on the bed, I sigh in relief as a warm wet cloth wipes the sweat from my brow. I give Marron a small smile, but he continues to look wounded. I can see the guilt eat away at him and shake my head to try and dispel it.  
  
"I cleaned your wounds last night," Marron says softly as he sits the side of the bed, facing me. "Mama cast a healing slumber spell on you, and we didn't think you would awaken so soon."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Turning my head I see the large purplish scars on my shoulders. Bloody stone-spikes, I can remember being pinned down by them while the Magic  
Engineer was trying to remove my clothes. Swallowing the rising bile back down, I turn to face both Marron and Gateau with pleading eyes.  
  
"You didn't see ... did you?" I croak. "The Magic Engineer and me?"  
  
My throat burns, and Marron helps me drink half a glass of water before answering. "Yes," my brother replies mournfully. "After we defeated the  
kinjus... Gateau and I went to look for you and saw ... Carrot I'm so sorry!"  
  
Once again, Marron bursts into sobs and cries on me, arms wrapped around my neck. Another ache stabs at me, and it's one that can never be healed. I would rather eat glass shards than be the reason for my brother's tears. I raise my arms up slowly, ignoring the pain, and wind my arms around his shoulders.  
  
"Hey," I say quietly. "It wasn't your fault, so don't blame yourself."  
  
He shudders in my arms and shakes his head. Lifting his face up, I notice that Marron's eyes are puffy and red, as if he has been crying for hours. Have they been like that the whole time? Why hadn't I seen it before, at lunch?  
  
"I promised I would protect you," Marron whispers, burying his head against my chest again. "I swore I would never let anyone hurt you... And ... And I couldn't keep my promise. It's my fault ... all of it is my..."  
  
"STOP IT!"  
  
I jerk Marron to face me and stare at his tear-streaked face. He's never cried this hard before. Resisting the urge to break down and cry too, I take a deep breath and look at him straight in the eye.  
  
"It. Wasn't. Your. Fault."  
  
I enunciate each word carefully. I think saying it slow lets my words sink in a little more. He's quiet for a moment and I can still see the denial on his face even as I pull him into a fierce hug. My aches scream at me in protest, but I tell them to cork their cry hole as I hold my brother. It's weird... I'm the one who gets violated and I'm comforting him.  
  
"It was no one's fault but that slimy bastard and he got his." I still don't remember what exactly happened; otherwise I'd probably be too traumatized to speak. I guess I should prepare myself, because my dreams certainly won't let me rest peacefully now. "He's dead, Marron, and he deserved whatever fate he got."  
  
"He deserved worse," Marron growls.  
  
"Yeah," I agree while brushing away his tears. "But blaming yourself isn't going to help... especially not me. I'm not going to pretend that it didn't happen..." I wish I could. "But I'm not going to dwell on it and let it drive me crazy..." Because I'm already crazy enough what with having dreams of a certain soul sucker.  
  
My brother gives me a small smile, and I guess things are going to be okay. Probably not like they were. Not yet, anyway. Marron's going to be an overprotective freak the next time we're on a mission. I doubt he'll ever forgive himself, but he'll pretend to for my sake. Eventually, we'll put this behind us... someday. Wow... I'm taking this better than I thought.  
  
Dotta breaks the silence and I would have loved to kiss her, if I hadn't been confined to a bed. Besides that my breath is still pretty bad. The  
winged girl brings in a pitcher of water and some clean linen cloths. She's not aware of what exactly had happened, but Marron promises to tell her a little later.  
  
"I really hope you get better soon, Carrot."  
  
"Thanks, Dotta..." I say while smiling. "Sorry about ... er ... my mess."  
  
"Oh!" Gateau hands the wooden bucket over to Dotta with a sheepish smile. "Uh... he left you another present, here..."  
  
"So ... what happened to um ... Tattle-mutt?" No point correcting his name now. The guy's dead ... and I seriously hope it was a horribly agonizing and gut-wrenching death. Hopefully there was a lot of gut wrenching involved.  
  
"You ate him," Gateau answers with an amused grin.  
  
"Ah... no wonder I feel sick."  
  
Dotta makes an 'eeww' sound as she holds the bucket with both hands. Her curiosity gets the better of her, and she looks right into it, and turns  
green. "I'll go wash this out!"  
  
We watch her fly out of the room and hope she doesn't spill any of it. Poor Dotta, I've really got to buy her something nice the next time I go  
shopping. Cleaning up someone's vomit twice in one day... that's love.  
  
  
***************  
  
  
The next few days roll by pretty slowly... there's not a whole lot you can do being confined to a bed. My body started feeling better yesterday, but Marron insisted that I needed more rest, and Big Mama agreed. She even came to my room before I went to bed last night and sat with me until I fell asleep. Chocolate and Tira are extremely gentle when they come to visit me: bringing flowers and sweets. It's kinda weird just talking to the girls without ending up with some kind of injury. Chocolate isn't even flirting with me right now like she always does ... I think Marron had a talk with her before she saw me. Well, that's what Gateau says.  
  
Marron is at my side twenty hours a day. It would be more if he had his way. Gateau has to drag while I kick to get him out of my room so he can actually get some sleep in a bed. I think he's waiting for me to finally crack and break down like rape victims usually do. How can I break down when I don't even remember what happened? I remember there being fire and ... the Magic Engineer of course, and when he kissed me... everything went red.  
  
The others say that he must have tried to kill me with his magic after he was... finished. Then my beast form threw him around awhile and finally ate him alive. Marron also added that, after the Sorcerer was devoured, a blue light shot out the creature's mouth, and I returned to normal. He explained that it was probably the Engineer's borrowed magic returning to it's caster. I think that's who Milphey was sent out to take care of. Speaking of the Haz Knight, I haven't seen him around. Guess, he's pretty busy now that one of the Sorcerer Hunter groups is off duty for a while.  
  
Another day goes by, and my source of entertainment is watching Marron and Gateau. They really are cute together. Hard to believe I was actually against it when I first found out, only for a little while, though. Marron told me that seeing me happy made him content, now it works both ways. Seeing him happy (which means blushing at Gateau's comments) with the one he loves makes me happy. Someday I would like that for myself: a nice relationship with someone who loves me and whom I love in return. It's pretty sappy when I think about it.  
  
I think Marron has stopped playing the 'blame game' with himself for a while and is just concerned with helping me keep my sanity ... from boredom. Eventually everyone got tired of eating at the dining table. So instead, we just eat here in my room. Kinda like our normal camping nights, sitting in a circle and just talking. Dotta even joins us, and we roast marshmallows. The room doesn't have a fireplace, and I doubt Big Mama would be happy to have a campfire set indoors; so we use candles. It works out all right despite the fact that Gateau gets some melted wax on his marshmallow and *still* eats it. We're all pretty grossed out.  
  
Right now, Gateau reminds me of this older blonde kid I used to play with. He ate worms just to show off and then would flex his puny muscles (okay his muscles were bigger than mine at the time.) I think I was really close to him, but don't remember his name. Bet that kid turned into a big muscle-headed jerk... if he survived the burning of our village. Okay, I don't need to be thinking about that now.  
  
"Gateau, you're holding it too close to the candle. That's why you keep getting melted wax on your marshmallows..." explains Marron.  
  
"Marron, baby," the blonde purrs loudly, putting an arm around his  
boyfriend. "I love it when you talk dirty."  
  
Chocolate and I end up howling with laughter, as Tira has to explain to poor Dotta the meaning of 'lewd comments'. Once again, the winged girl makes an 'eeww' sound and decides she's isn't hungry anymore. Marron blushes like a tomato and mutters 'pervert' under his breath.  
  
"Not to worry," Gateau assures him. "My marshmallows will only melt for you..."  
  
You know what? I don't think I'm hungry anymore either.  
  
We end up staying awake past midnight, and everyone is very full and very sleepy. Luckily it wasn't that late, since we have a mission tomorrow that requires us getting up early and walking to some village. Same old, same old. Have to help Gateau drag Marron out of my bedroom for the night and convince my little brother that I'm going to be just fine. Haven't had any nightmares or flashbacks of what happened. So there is no reason for him to worry.  
  
At least that's what I thought...  
  
  
***************  
  
  
I don't want to be here anymore. I know what happened, and I don't want to remember any of the details. I don't want to remember the feel of his hands on me or the pain he caused when he took his pleasure.  
  
Fire  
  
Why do all my nightmares contain fire? Some place is always burning ... but it's not the heat I feel. The cold of clammy hands brush against my spine and make me shiver uncontrollably. It's cold despite the bright orange flames. They writhe and change color until they settle on black. What does it mean?  
  
I'm laying naked in a dark puddle of blood on the ground, my blood. It flows like crimson streams from the wounds in my shoulders. My clothes and sword are discarded to the side, far from my reach. My friends are oblivious to my defeat and still fighting those kinjus. I try calling out to them but can only manage a rasping groan. Screaming "get your hands off me" at the top of my lungs has only made my throat sore and dry.  
  
It feels like I'm watching outside my head. I can see things clearly although my eyes are squeezed shut. I wish I was blind. The Magic Engineer lifts his head from between my legs and gives me a leering smile. Little tremors run through my limbs, and I almost lose my stomach at the sight my essence running down his chin.  
  
I look away, willing myself to black out. If only I could ... then I won't feel his fingers probing in places that shouldn't be probed. I bite my lip at the intrusion of those fingers as they invade and stretch and ...  
  
Oh fuck ...  
  
Okay, now I think I truly have gone blind. My eyes are open, and I can't see a damn thing but two bright spots. Minutes go by, and I realize that I'm shaking like I'm possessed. The feeling is intense, my muscles clenching around those fingers, wanting more. When I regain my sight, the Sorcerer is leaning over me, on me, eye to eye, and grinning triumphantly.   
  
  
"Did you like that, little Sorcerer Hunter?" he asks, twisting his fingers and making me wince. "I'm sure you did ..."  
  
He mumbles something else, but all my brain is paying attention to is the withdrawal of those fingers and something else nudging insistently against my body, trying to fight its way inside. Swallowing hard, I try and move away. My efforts receive a sneer from the man on top of me.  
  
"Where do you think you're going?" he demands. "I'm not through with you yet!"  
  
My world explodes in pain and nothing else matters. Not this mission... not the burning city... not even my friends, only this feeling of being split in half. The metallic taste that fills my mouth can't distract me from the brutal thrusts. They're ripping me open...  
  
The stench of blood is everywhere, suffocating me. I want it to... I want to die of asphyxiation right here and now, anything to stop feeling him violate my body. He lets out a low chuckle and thrusts deeper and harder until he can't go any further. Then he pulls back and starts over. Help...  
  
[ 'Kill him' ]  
  
  
If I could, don't you think I would have done it already?! My eyes open and look around frantically. Who's speaking to me? Have I finally lost it?  
  
  
[ 'Unless you enjoy this kind of humiliation...']  
  
  
I don't! I hate it! Someone help me! Where are my friends ... my brother ...why won't they help me?!  
  
  
[ 'They can't. The only one who can help you is yourself.' ]  
  
  
Then, I'm screwed, aren't I?! It's already too late! I couldn't stop him from killing those people ... from burning the city ... hell, I can't even stop him from raping me! What am I supposed to do?! How can I kill him like this?!  
  
  
[ 'Give in to your fear. It will set you free.' ]  
  
  
I can't ... I can't do that. I don't want to remember that... Big Mama said I didn't have to ... leave me alone!  
  
  
[ 'Then do nothing. The world will not change and neither will your suffering. Your friends will die and the Magic Engineer will keep you for himself. Is that what you want?' ]  
  
  
No, I don't want that.  
  
  
[ 'Then, kill him. Avenge your pride and let your fear transform you...' ]  
  
  
I don't want to face it alone  
  
  
[ 'You won't.' ]  
  
  
I don't want to feel regret.  
  
  
[ 'You won't. Destruction is the only way to salvation, why should you regret it? ' ]  
  
  
I want him dead.  
  
  
[ 'Then take his life. He may be the 'Man closest to God' at present. But he is no match for an actual God ... he is nothing and you are everything.' ]  
  
  
I won't regret it?  
  
  
[ 'You won't regret it. I promise. Kill him and all those who have wronged you and stood in your way. Kill him. Kill them all.' ]  
  
...Yes...  
  
  
  
***************  
  
  
I wake up with a start. Gasping, I sit up in bed while clutching the blankets around me for dear life. Perspiration trickles down my forehead, and I absently wipe it away. It's then I notice that there's someone else in the room.  
  
The figure of a man is seated beside the bed. Squinting in the darkness, I can make out some of his features. God, don't let it be who I think it is. Swallowing hard, my lips call out a name before I have a chance to think.   
  
"Zaha?" The figure in the chair flinches, and I know I have made a mistake. "Who's there?"  
  
"It's me, Carrot."  
  
"Milphey?" I let out a sigh of relief. "What are you doing here?" It must be hours after midnight.  
  
"I couldn't sleep," he answers hesitantly. "I was only going to sit here for a little while. Were you having another nightmare?"  
  
"Yes ... no ..." I feel like a retard. "I dunno ... can't remember it now."  
  
"You're lying," the Haz Knight accuses gently. "Why?"  
  
"I honestly don't know."  
  
He's quiet for several seconds before speaking again, "If you want, I can stay here for a few more hours to wake you up in case you have another nightmare."  
  
I wish I could see his expression, but he sounds concerned. I don't want to turn him away and consequently have another nightmare. "I would like that, thanks."  
  
"Then go back to sleep, Carrot."  
  
I lay back down and close my eyes, waiting for sleep to return. Hopefully without a bad dream about ... in fact I don't mind if I don't dream at all tonight. I just want nothing. My lips twist into a small smile as I remember the Magic Engineer's dying scream.  
  
I don't regret it.  
  
  
[ Author's Notes ]  
  
Confused? I know I am ^_^ 


	6. Chapter Six

Catharsis  
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
email: teno_hikari@yahoo.com / tenohikari@cs.com   
Beta Read by: Bluepard and Sarryn  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story   
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte; Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or worse?  
  
Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the anime or read the  
manga for a few years.  
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.  
  
  
**********  
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
It seems what's left of my human side  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
(Will you give in to me?)  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
violently it changes  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
-Disturbed 'Down with the sickness'  
  
**********  
  
  
Nearly two months go by as we make up for all our vacation time. Along with the fact that Mama's Sorcerer Hunters are dropping like flies. Not literally, of course, but our secret organization is shrinking and may not be so 'secret' anymore. Rumor is we have a leak somewhere. Wonderful. While the Haz Knights are investigating, we're stuck doing double missions. More evil sorcerers and sleepless nights. So work sucks ass right now ... and so does my mood.  
  
  
Every day is another 'bad day' for me as I find myself ignoring almost all the pretty women in sight. It's not like I've given up skirt-chasing completely (at least I hope not), but it takes a lot out of me. Pursuing the  
quarry, getting shot down, and then getting back up, drains me of my energy more than work does. Instead, I just concentrate on the assignment ... I mean it is my fault that we're behind anyway. Can't say that out loud, though, or the others will go into another depressing mood.  
  
Other than being tired and overworked, the others are doing okay. Marron is still my shadow when we're on a mission. At least he gives me my privacy. Gateau is being less of a jackass... but we still get into our squabbles and, of course, poor Marron is stuck in the middle. That dreaded 'time of the month' that the sisters go through is here. It's like a hurricane, and we're smart enough to stay the hell away until the storm dies down. So, that's what we're doing: hiding out at some restaurant in a town... in the middle of nowhere.  
  
Since I don't remember the name of this place, I've renamed it Sucksville. Other than killing off our target, there's nothing to do here. Our mission was also nothing. Get this, the evil Sorcerer turned people and animals into lawn sculptures, then sold them off. Okay, it was an evil act... maybe an average on the bad-guy scale (maybe), but other than that, he was as sharp as a beach ball.  
  
Sorcerer: 'Who are you guys? Wanna buy a statue?'  
Us: 'No and we're Sorcerer Hunters!'  
Sorcerer: 'Hunters? What'cha hunting?'  
Us: 'Sorcerers.'  
Sorcerer: 'Huh? I'm a sor... sorcy... sorcer.. that thing...'  
Us: 'Yes, that's why we're hunting you.'  
Sorcerer: 'Hunting me? Who are you guys?'  
  
It took the dork five minutes for it to sink in that we were there to kill him. Then another five before he decided to try to run away. He ended up colliding into one of his own statues and breaking his neck. Amazingly, all of his statues came back to life again. Why can't all our cases be this easy? I'd rather deal with a hundred of that idiot sorcerer than a single soul sucking one.  
  
Speaking of him, I haven't had another dream of him since we left the Stellar Church. Maybe it's both the work dumped on us and the sleeping drugs that cause these dreamless nights. Or, on the other hand, maybe I was on drugs during the time I did dream of him. Or maybe both, and drugs are simply involved somewhere in the equation. Anyway, my prayers have been answered, and every night I go to sleep peacefully.  
  
Speaking of sleep...  
  
Gateau and Marron are still chatting away while I've been zoning out for a couple of minutes. My little brother looks past the rim of his teacup to see me stretch my arms and stifle a yawn. Who knew doing nothing could be so exhausting? I give up on my unfinished dinner and push my chair back to  
stand up.   
  
"Brother?"  
  
Yes, mom? I try not to look irritated as I face Marron and give him a lazy smile. "I'm gonna head back to the Inn now... see you guys later."  
  
"Hey," Gateau gestures to my plate. "You barely touched your...stuff."  
  
Upon a second glance, I have no idea what I ordered for dinner. Our waitress mumbled something about tonight's special, and I ordered it. The *special* turned out to be a plate of multi-colored slop that tasted like cabbage boiled in Tabasco sauce. My God of Hunger is not pleased. In fact, I think it's going to wreak havoc if I even look at the slop again.   
  
"No, you can have it."  
  
I didn't even wait for his response as I leave the restaurant. Now feeling less nauseated, I walk around the village and stop by some of the open shops. The predatory looks these clerks give me are pretty scary: 'look  
fresh meat!'. Obviously they don't get many tourists here because it's such a sucky place (and let's not forget the fact that an idiot Sorcerer turned people into lawn sculptures.) After annoying the shop clerks by not buying anything, I wander around some more.  
  
"Hello again, dear."  
  
No way. My head jerks in the direction that familiar voice came from. There's just no way ... not out here in Sucksville. Taking a step forward I can see her now, the old woman I met months ago. It was her who sold me the shirt I'm wearing now, which still looks as good as knew.  
  
"Uh, hi," I manage to say as I step into the dim alley where she has her shop set up. She still has the same items for sale, though: candles, old pocket watches that don't work anymore, copper jewelry, and a few new items. "Weird meeting again ... here of all places."  
  
"I travel around a lot. An old woman like myself has to make a living somehow."  
  
"As long as you're not selling lawn sculptures..." the words slip out before I realize it. Of course she looks like she has no idea what I'm talking about and gives me a small smile.  
  
"Well, I'm glad to meet you again, dear," says the old woman as her smile gets wider. It's kinda freaking me out right now. "I have something special for you."  
  
  
***************  
  
Chapter Six  
  
***************  
  
  
"Good morning!" I chirp. Yes, chirp because of the nice dreamless sleep last night. Sitting down at one of the Inn table with my friends for breakfast, they look at me and mumble. Well, Chocolate and Tira don't say anything since they're both moody as hell. Marron looks a little tired since he's been up all night nursing Gateau. Looking at the older Sorcerer Hunter, he looks sick and disheveled, as if he were caught up in a violent tornado. Turns out Gateau got a bad stomachache from the food last night. Someone getting sick from eating dinner that smelled like month-old unwashed socks? Imagine my shock.  
  
Well, breakfast at the Inn is tastier than the multi-colored slop I had ordered for dinner last night. I think I ate enough for three people. Wait... I did eat enough for three people: My breakfast that I polished off  
in five minutes, Gateau's because of his stomach ache and Tira's since she was feeling bloated.  
  
"Well," I begin, leaning back in my seat after finishing breakfast. "Are we finally leaving this place?"  
  
There a loud 'poof' and smoke fills my vision until I find myself back at the Stellar Church with the others.  
  
"Hi, guys!" Dotta waves happily at us, and when I'm about to wave back I notice that neither Big Mama or the Haz Knights are present. It isn't uncommon for Dotta to address us alone, but it is rare. The messenger looks a little stressed, and I can tell.  
  
"Hey, Dotta," I say, giving her a small smile. "What's up?"  
  
More rustling as she refuses to meet my gaze. "Um, well... Big Mama said there was no case for you now..."  
  
"Well, that's a relief," Gateau mumbles as he straightens up a little, absently rubbing his stomach.  
  
"Yes, but you also have to stay in town until a new case is assigned," adds the winged girl. "Sorry, those were Mama's orders."  
  
"I don't believe that will be a problem," says Marron.  
  
"Good! Well, see ya later!"  
  
There's another 'poof' and, as I watch the smoke swirl away, I find myself worrying. The setting returns back to the normal Inn, and Gateau makes a run for the bathroom. Marron follows after him while Tira and Chocolate attempt to eat. I can't do anything as a sense of dread fills me. There's something wrong, and the dream of Zaha confronting Mama and her knights suddenly replays in my mind.  
  
['Carrot Glace belongs to me.']  
  
It was just a dream. A dream that doesn't mean anything. But that look in his eyes when he said that ... it felt ... once again, familiar. I hate that word. I really, really, hate that word.  
  
  
**********  
  
  
Since Gateau helped me in my moment of ...forceful expulsion of stomach contents, I thought I'd try and do something nice for him. Because I couldn't talk Marron into wearing nothing but a red bow (not that I would pimp out my little brother like that!), I decided to get my sick teammate some real food when he recovers. Of course, that meant me going around town and taste testing, but I was up for the challenge.  
  
Once back at the Inn, I tap at Gateau's door with my foot. I really hope they're not having sex right now. If they are... I'm eating the food I brought.  
  
"Hey!" I shout, kicking his door. "Let me in!"  
  
The door opens and a shirtless Gateau sticks his head out. "Not on the hair of my chinny-chin-chin."  
  
With that, he grabs the food and closes the door behind him. What a pig. I kick the door again. Hard. "You're welcome, jackass!"  
  
I hear him say thanks behind the door before I throw my hands into the air and head to my own room. I'm bored, and Gateau's getting both food and sex at the same time. Life just isn't fair. I'd go talk to either Chocolate or Tira, but both of them are kinda of unapproachable right now. When I came back to the Inn the Misu sisters were on non-speaking terms to everyone, even each other. Man, it hasn't gotten this bad in a long time. Since I'll never solve the mystery of a female's menstrual cycle, I decide to take a nap.  
  
Flopping on the bed, I resist the urge to use it as a trampoline. I'm in a scary good mood right now and actually look for some hot babes in town. There aren't that many. In fact I see only one, but she is married to the burly blacksmith of the town; correction, a freaky burly blacksmith, who could hack me in half with his bucktooth teeth. So I do the smart thing for once and steered clear.  
  
My hand wanders into my pants pocket to retrieve the gift that old hag gave to me the other night. A long yellow ribbon made of silk. It weird-ed me out when it was placed in my hands. Why in the world would she give it to me? What had made her think I'd want it? Regardless, I took it anyway, and she only smiled before walking away into the darkness.  
  
On a closer look, with the sunlight filtering through the windows, I notice that the ribbon is pretty worn. There are tatters on one end and dirt smudges all over. There's one spot of something dark brown ... no wait  
...red. Yes, now that I'm squinting my eyes the color is definitely red. What was it? Ketchup? Tomato sauce? Paint?  
  
Yeah, I'm pretty bored right now if I'm thinking about what caused such a stain. The color of the ribbon kinda reminds me of someone. Someone blonde? A beautiful girl? No... I just can't place my finger on it. Instead, I place it on the dark mark and something snaps.  
  
My head hurts all of a sudden with a skull splitting ache...ears ringing ... it hurts ... everything ... everything is spinning ... can't see straight ... what ...  
  
What's wrong ...  
  
  
....with ...  
  
  
....me ...?  
  
  
**********  
  
  
"Disperse!"  
  
There's a blinding light followed by a loud explosion that sends debris flying everywhere. I brace myself for the impact, but it goes through me harmlessly. Standing on top of a pile of rubble, I notice there's no fire,  
only darkness, and the full moon that hangs in the night sky. Finally, another dream. Odd... this isn't one of my normal dreams ... or nightmares.  
  
I'm suddenly walking towards the source of the chaos. Like a moth to a flame, I guess ... a part of me is afraid to encounter the fires that haunt my nightmares. But I'm still moving, the sound of gravel crunching underneath the heels of my boots.  
  
Getting closer, I can feel it ... and there ... right before me ... My heart skips a beat when my eyes locate three bodies sprawled on the ground. Lifeless. I rush forward and pray that they're still alive, whoever they were.  
  
"Hey!" I'm leaning over one of them now. "Are you alive?!"  
  
Stupid question, but I'm hoping for any kind of answer, even if it's a slap on the head. No response, and my blood runs cold as I turn the body over. A Haz Knight. The three black robed figures are ... were ... Mama's Haz Knights ... the elite. Who the hell could have done this to them?!  
  
I whip my head around and look for any sign of the white robed Haz Knight whom I consider as a friend now. The person who stayed with me after one of my worse nightmares. Please ... don't be dead... Milphey ... wait ... I-I can hear him! Up there, farther ahead, I can see Milphey standing ...sort of. From the look on his exposed face, I can tell he won't be standing for long.  
  
I cast another glance at the unconscious Knights before rushing towards the one I know. What's going on? What happened? Who on Earth are they fighting? All my questions are answered the moment I catch sight of Milphey's opponent.  
  
Zaha Torte.  
  
I swear this guy is like a magnet for me. Ever since I met with the soul-sucker on that mountain, I've been caught up in a maelstrom of confusion and pain. He's an enemy to Big Mama and the rest of us... but why?  
  
"You've done well to last this long," says the violet-eyed man, looking at the injured Haz Knight. "Milphey Yu, in respect to your memory..."  
  
Zaha unsheathes his own sword, and I stop breathing as fear has rooted me to the ground. Milphey lets out a war cry, charging forward. NO! No... this can't be happening. The scene seems to go in slow motion, and I want to cry out to stop it. The sorcerer raises his sword, then brings it down in a single streak of silvery brilliance.  
  
Silence. I can't hear anything, not even the sound of my drumming heart. My eyes widen as I watch Milphey fall to the ground, his blood pooling around him. Emerald hair spills over his face. I can't tell if he's breathing or not. Zaha sheathes his sword before leaning down to pick up something that is laying on the ground.  
  
Milphey...  
  
This is all just some bad dream. There's no way one Sorcerer could take out all the Haz Knights. No way in hell. The fluttering sound of wings breaks the silence, and I look up to see something flying over my head. A crow?  
  
"Ah, so you've located him again. Good. Now take this." Zaha smiles slightly as the black bird swoops down and plucks the offered bright colored object from his hand. "Guide him back to me."  
  
The crow lets out a cawing sound before it flies off into the night. My eyes follow its departure before returning to its master, who looms over the bleeding Haz Knight. Then everything fades away as the scenery changes from the battlefield ... to a bedroom. I really would have preferred the former than the latter. Really.  
  
  
**********  
  
  
Candle light flickers in the dimly lit room, casting shadows upon the ceiling. I'm suddenly caught up in a whirlwind of sensations, and it's impossible to describe them all. It's just so hot... but it wasn't like  
scalding-boiling hot or sickly-fever-hot; no it was... mmm...nice.  
  
Hands run up and down my sides as a warm mouth plants kisses on my throat. My skin is burning ... melting. I'm in hell and I love it. Hate it. I-I don't know, but I know I don't want it to stop. I mean I do! I hate this...I hate how good this feels... how good he's making me feel. I hate this because of him.  
  
He lifts his head to meet my stare. Those violet orbs still frighten me. Even when he tried to kill me the first time on the mountain, I still came back. Yeah, I'm an idiot. My arms, of their own accord and independent of my tumultuous mind, wind about his neck. Stop. Don't stop. This is wrong. Don't stop... please.  
  
"I've waited a long time for this moment," he says quietly. "For this..." his fingers trail down my chest as he continues, "For you, and the fulfillment of my dream."  
  
He reaches forward to press his lips to mine. I groan into this kiss, spreading my legs so he can settle between them. So good. I don't have the slightest idea of what he's talking about. But, I don't care right now. The only thing I'm aware of is him ... inside me and the mixture of pain and pleasure that follows his invasion. This is wrong. Right. Wrong. Right. Wrong. Oh God.  
  
My nails dig into the skin of his back as I wrap my legs tighter around his middle. My body adjusts to the pain quickly, and it's just a bit uncomfortable. So, it isn't so bad. I mean, the pain pales against Taltmut's forcefulness. Holding on tight as he shifts against me, I'm still having a hard time believing this is real.  
  
Carrot Glace is attracted only to women and would be repulsed to be in this position with another male. I should be freaked out, screaming to be released, disgusted to the point where I'm coughing up my intestines, and more. Instead, I'm all over him, kissing, clawing, mewling, just wanting more of what he has to offer me.   
  
Perspiration runs along his throat as he fights some kind of internal struggle. Our eyes meet once more and a shiver runs down my spine. His violet-eyes are like a windows into my nightmare. Those dark dreams that  
contain the fire that burns down everything and leaves nothing but cinders.   
  
His lips form an amused smile. "Well, are you afraid of me now?"  
  
"There are scarier things," I automatically respond. It is just like when he first asked me on the mountain. If only I hadn't saved him. If only I hadn't come back to him. If only, if only...  
  
"Such as?" he prompts, pulling out a little before sliding back in place. I let out a hiss between my clenched teeth while telling my nagging urges to shut up. Did I mention how much I hate/enjoy this?  
  
"Two dominatrix sisters going through their 'time of the month'."  
  
He actually laughs, and I'm not sure what to make of this. His laugh scares me since it is so sudden. Yet, at the same time, it makes me feel even warmer. For some reason my nostalgia for my childhood returns.  
  
"Do you actually fear your female companions more than death?" asks the Sorcerer. "Or are you one of those foolish and naive youths who believe themselves to be invincible?"  
  
"I know I'm foolish and naive," I answer. "But I know I'm not invincible. I do fear death, I think everyone does." Swallowing hard, I dispel my fears and continue to look him straight in the eye. "Don't you?"  
  
Zaha tilts his head in consideration before grasping my forearms to pull me close. "Death is nothing as long as I can make my dream reality."  
  
"My dream," the sorcerer purrs as leans forward to kiss me again while thrusting eagerly. "...Our dream."  
  
  
**********  
  
  
I wake, this time surprisingly calm, and it kinda scares the hell out of me. Sitting up in bed, I bring my clenched fist towards my face and open it to see the yellow ribbon. That bright piece of fabric that the crow had taken in its talons... Milphey's bow.  
  
I know what I have to do now.  
  
[ Author's Note ]  
  
Short chapter, blame the plot bunnies that are breeding away in my head. 


	7. Chapter Seven

ï»¿Catharsis  
  
Written By: Teno Hikari  
  
email: teno_hikari@yahoo.com / tenohikari@cs.com  
  
beta-reader: Sarryn and Bluepard  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bakuretsu Hunters ... just this story  
  
Summary: After his confrontation with the evil sorcerer, Zaha Torte, Carrot Glace finds himself changing ... but is it for better or worse?   
  
Takes place during 'Sorcerer's Revenge' (the second season of the TV series - I believe) after Episode 15 - 'Until we meet again'. I'll try and be as accurate as possible even though I haven't seen the anime or read the manga for a few years.   
  
Warning: Violence, adult situations, and yaoi - you've been warned.  
  
**********  
  
Drowning deep in my sea of loathing   
  
Broken your servant I kneel ...  
  
(Will you give in to me?)  
  
It seems what's left of my human side   
  
Is slowly changing in me ...  
  
(Will you give in to me?)  
  
Looking at my own reflection when suddenly it changes  
  
violently it changes   
  
There is no turning back now you've woken up the demon in me....  
  
-Disturbed 'Down with the sickness'   
  
**********  
  
This is stupid. I conclude that, despite my noble intentions, I'm an idiot. Chasing after a woman, an old woman at that, is just completely insane. Common sense tells me not to go, and, again, I tell it to kiss my ass.  
  
'One one-thousand... two one-thousand... three one-thousand... four...'  
  
The sun begins to set as I continue to count the seconds while waiting for that old crow to show up. Leaving the Inn at a quarter before six, and avoiding the highly emotional dominatrix sisters, I had tried my damndest to find the spot where I last saw her, if she really was an old woman. Hey, if I can turn into a bull-bear beast monster by getting zapped by magic - then anything is possible.  
  
I clutch the bloodstained silk ribbon in one hand, my other clenching every five seconds to help me keep track of time. Six o'clock... that hour seems to be stuck in my head for some reason. Then I realize that this is when the sun usually sets. It will be dark soon, and I'm sure the others will be worried about me. Just like the first time I met her and returned bruised from a fight.  
  
A part of me is praying that she won't show up; that whatever dream I had earlier was just a nightmare. Then again, when have my nightmares just been dreams? Especially the ones connected to Zaha Torte, a man I definitely fear and... possibly lust over.  
  
Lust.  
  
Dear God. The thought of me gay - *me* of all people on Spooner Continent- sounded weird, impossible, and just ... wrong. I'm not attracted to other men. Maybe if I repeat this a hundred times I'll actually believe it.  
  
Counting off another minute, I watch the last rays of light vanish, almost shaking with anticipation. What if she doesn't show up and the whole nightmare means nothing at all? If and when she does appear, then what? Will she cackle (like the witch she probably is) at my stupidity and take me to him? When I do see him again in the waking world, what am I supposed to do? What would he want?  
  
[ 'You are mine.' ]  
  
[ 'I want back what belongs to me.' ]  
  
Oh... right. I shudder as images of the last part of my dream return to me. When he and I were... no, it ... wasn't a dream. Well, it was, but now that I think about it, it feels like a memory. Just one I can't remember. Well, damn.  
  
Come on, you old witch, where the hell are you?!  
  
"Hello again, dear. You look like you're waiting for someone..."  
  
"Yeah!" I exclaim, whirling around to face the speaker. "Took you long enough, grand....maa...."  
  
I finish the sentence with a drooling 'gaaaahhhh' as my eyes catch sight at the beauteous creature before me: tall, gorgeous, young, sleek, dark, sexy, and best of all, definitely female! With the outfit she is wearing, it makes me wonder if sheÂ's a belly dancer. A belly dancer in Sucksville? What is her dress made of... Silk scarves?! I could see right through them... and my eyes are ready to pop out of my head.  
  
She giggles, and her chest seems to be laughing at me, too. I can't tear my eyes away! Then again, why would I want to? Running a tongue over crimson lips, golden eyes focus only on me, giving me a hungry look. ItÂ's as if she wants to eat me. Why is it that only the sadistic ones are after me? Is there any chance in this lifetime that I can get someone a little more normal?  
  
"'Grandma'?" she asks in a incredulous tone, brushing some luscious black curls from her pale face, revealing a glittering ruby headband. "Do I look like an old woman to you?"  
  
"N-N-no!" I stammer, my heart pounding. It's weird, there's this gorgeous babe right in front of me, talking to me, and I'm rooted to the spot! Move, stupid legs, move! Part of my brain won't seem to respond either since I can't think of anything to say.  
  
Wait a second... there's something odd about her. Well, not her in general, but I just feel like I.... know her. I'm starting to feel really freaked out now, like I should be running *away* from this exotic looking lady.  
  
Reaching out, she cups my chin in her hand. A red manicured fingernail brushes against my lower lip. Her huntress eyes capture mine instantly, and now I really can't move. Seriously, it's like my body has been frozen in place.  
  
She leans forward, brushing her lips against mine, and I have the sudden urge to scream. However, she doesn't kiss me, instead she pulls back a little and grins. Her eyes narrow in laughter, silently mocking my weakness.  
  
I'm trembling like a leaf... why the hell am I trembling?!  
  
"You really are a pretty boy," she says as her hand brushes against the fabric of my shirt. "I wonder what your lips taste like..."  
  
Heart still hammering in my chest at the question, I finally find my voice and use it. "Why don't you find out?"  
  
Her lovely eyes widen slightly in surprise, but she just laughs. I'm starting to form a headache, wishing she would stop laughing. It's not loud and crazy like either of the Misu sistersÂ' when they transform. No, it's soft and would almost sound soothing, but I don't know why it irritates me.  
  
"Oh no," she replies, smiling and shaking her head. "I can't do that!"  
  
"W-Why not?"  
  
"Because..." she purrs softly as her finger at my lip slides down along my neck. I swallow hard once she stops at my heart, and wonder if she will wrench it out right now. My blood turns cold when I meet her gaze once again... there's something about her eyes...  
  
"'Because' what?"  
  
"Because you already belong to someone."  
  
***************  
  
Chapter Seven  
  
***************  
  
I've met a lot of weird people in my line of work. Being a Sorcerer Hunter, it's to be expected. As I follow Methuselah, a creepy name for a creepy lady, I begin to think about my past encounters with Sorcerers. I should protest and ask where we're going, but my mouth is feeling lazy all of a sudden. Wonderful. Don't go with any strangers, even if they offer you candy... unless they're hot... and this babe could turn you to cinders by batting an eyelash.  
  
I should go back, but I don't know the way. Actually, I'm not sure where the hell I am right now. It doesn't look like Sucksville... more like one of those places. Yeah, isn't that helpful? Seriously, it looks like one of 'those' places...  
  
Damn. I wish the guys were here to smack some sense into me. Literally. I think I need it.  
  
"So, how much longer?" I ask as we step out of another alley and into a new street. Okay, now I know we're not in Sucksville anymore; not with the brightly colored lights and crowds of people. Each one of them is wearing a mask... is this a party?  
  
"Have I died and gone to... the Twilight Zone? Or am I just losing my mind?"  
  
Methuselah lets out another giggle. Must keep from drooling... Ugh, too late. It's not my fault that my eyes are perverts. Really, it's not me! Not that I'm not enjoying the view but...  
  
"You dirty old man!"  
  
Huh? What? I'm not a...  
  
"...dirty old man, I'm a dirty young man!"  
  
Whoa... I just heard myself speak when I wasn't speaking. How weird is that? Turning my head, I follow the voices as one of the masked people unmasks.  
  
Lila? What is she doing here? The girl I met in the rain all those months ago just smiles at me before placing her mask back on. I want to go after her, but Methuselah - jeez that's a tongue twisty name - pulls me forward.  
  
/* Love is blind, as they say. Lila taught you that love can lead to tragedy. She betrayed her own sister, her flesh and blood. All those women she helped feed to that Sorcerer's Gamuru, their blood is on her hands as well. For what? For the love of someone who would have turned her into food for his dragon as well? *\  
  
But Lila changed. Everyone deserves a second chance...  
  
/ * Has she changed? * \  
  
Looking back over my shoulder, I find Lila again dancing with another masked man. He laughs as he spins her in his arms, and leans forward to whisper into her ear. She giggles, obviously happy by whatever compliments he's given. Removing his mask, I found myself gaping... It can't be... he's dead... that Sorcerer is dead! We saw him fall!  
  
/ * She will follow and obey only her desires. Love has controlled her selfish actions and caused others harm. Lila will always be his puppet, even in death. *\  
  
That's not true...  
  
/ * She truly deserved to be eaten by the Gamuru. *\  
  
No! She doesn't! No one does!  
  
"...Sorry. Next time, I'll separate the recyclable trash."  
  
What? Metasenia? She's here too, standing in a crowd of handsome and beautiful men. I remember flirting with her, believing she gave that flower to me as an act of kindness. It really was a pretty flower...  
  
/ * Beautiful it may have been. Yet, mother nature shows us many times that things that have beauty are also poisonous. * \  
  
So she was vain, and it caused people to suffer, but she's dead now...  
  
/ * And yet you make the same mistakes again. * \  
  
"Mr. Carrot Glace, I'm honored by your presence..."  
  
Another dancer catches my eye, this one with long beautiful golden hair... wait... do I know her? She turns to me, removing her mask, and smiles sweetly.  
  
Barbara... that cute and innocent girl who turned out to be a Sorceress whip-wielding dominatrix bunny. She was like a bad version of Tira... a really bad pink-nightmare version. But I killed her... she won't harm anyone anymore...  
  
/ * Whoever invites destruction willingly into their home, deserves such a fate. *\  
  
What are you trying to say?! She attacked me first! I had to do it!  
  
/ * Of course. The same would go for the other sorcerers, wouldn't it? Sorcerers like Viscount Taltmut? *\  
  
Suddenly I'm shoved through a crowd of people. Familiar faces and masks become a blur until I find myself in front of someone. A man. A man who's face is hidden beneath an ivory carved mask that had a wicked laughing expression. I may be clueless as times, but the long silvery blonde hair is a dead give away.  
  
I spit his name out like a shard of glass. "Taltmut."  
  
A gloved hand reaches up to remove the mask, revealing that sinister and leering smile that exists in my nightmares. I donÂ't think I can ever hate and fear anyone that much. I want to rip off that smile and his face altogether.  
  
/ * You did worse. You ate him. You killed him * \  
  
Immediately I cover my ears when the slight chatter of the party is drowned out by several high pitched screams: wailing, whimpering and screeching so loud that I wanted to scream myself. What's happening?! What's going on?!  
  
Red fills my vision and I squeeze my eyes tight. I don't want to see this. I don't want to hear this!  
  
/ * You've been blind and deaf for to long. Shielding yourself like a child who doesn't wish to face the truth. Why don't you listen and look? * \  
  
NO! I don't want to!  
  
/ * Move your hands from your ears and open your eyes * \  
  
Stop it! I don't want to! Leave me the fuck alone!  
  
/ * No. Not until you hear and see what is before you. Not until you face reality. * \  
  
Some strong and invisible force makes me drop my hands to my side. The noise grows louder, almost deafening me. I wish it would. Feeling as if they were being pried open, my eyelids lift up, and I can see again.  
  
Red.  
  
/ * The color of truth * \  
  
Yet, I can't see anything besides that color. Have I gone blind? The screaming stops and a calm, eerie silence is all I can hear. That or my eardrums have finally popped like balloons.   
  
Silence.  
  
I can't hear anything. Not even the sound of my rapidly beating heart. Am I deaf?  
  
Am I dead?  
  
/ * No, you are awake. * \  
  
I take a deep breath and realize that I'm all alone now, standing in the darkness. I don't have a clue where it is though, so I call out Methuselah's name. No response. Did she abandon me? Just great...  
  
Taking a step forward, I find myself treading blindly through water in the darkness. I think it's water. Well, I'm sure hoping it is... and what's that stench?! Ugh... it's suffocating me! ...Seeping into my clothes... what the hell?!  
  
There's a light up ahead in the center of all this darkness. I don't know if that's a good sign or not. It's a candle. A single candle that lights up the whole place and casts long shadows against an alley wall. The flame flickers and dances, drawing my attention instantly like a moth's.  
  
The foul smell intensifies, and I think I'm going to be sick. My clothes are soaked and the taste of metal is on my tongue. Copper? Iron? I brought my hand to my mouth and spit on it. It is black. No, red.  
  
Blood.  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
Is that my heart beating again? So I am alive. This... this couldn't be real. I'm not injured, so it can't be my blood. No. It's not mine. Then...whose?  
  
Looking down at my hands again, I stare at the red, glistening object I'm holding. Again, what the hell? I know I didn't pick it up. It just suddenly appeared there and it is vibrating... beating?  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
Oh shit! My eyes widen horror, ready to jump out of my sockets and run off. This... this thing - is a heart. A freaking human heart! The thing pulses as if it were still functioning inside a person's body. The beating grows louder, but this time it's my heart that's racing.  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
...bump...  
  
..........  
  
The organ falls from my bloodied fingers into the water below. Oh, and guess what... it's not water after all. Red... red everywhere! My stomach flip-flops. It's amazing that it's not trying to escape out my nose by now!  
  
There's something floating by my feet and, against my will, I bend down to pick it up. Dark liquid covers my bare arms as I examine it closely, turning it around in my hands. It's like a basketball, but the shape isn't as round. My fingers stroke through soft and damp pink- almost red - tendrils... it feels like... hair? Naw, it couldn't be.  
  
I uncover a part of the object, pulling the soft mass aside, and nearly lose my stomach this time. A face stares back at me, features twisted in absolute horror and agony. Whoever this is- was - sure suffered a lot...  
  
Wait... I-I know this person. I mean, I know who this person was. God. I'm being awfully calm about this...  
  
[ "So ... what happened to um ... Tattle-mutt?" ]  
  
[ "You ate him." ]  
  
Taltmut faces me, his expression frozen as I hold his head in my bloodied hands. Why the fuck am I still holding it?! Squeezing my eyes shut, I hurl his head as far as I can. A loud splash echoes throughout the room.  
  
Where am I?  
  
There's a cold draft chilling me as I move towards the bright flickering candle. It glows even brighter, and that's when I realize that I'm not in a room. No, it's... an alley, a secluded one kind of like the place where I... bought my shirt.  
  
"Come out, you old witch!" I holler, listening to my voice echo. Okay, let me think this over: I was following a creepy - but gorgeous - witch, and there was a party. Masks with Familiar faces. Blood, lots of blood. Heart beating in hand. Taltmut's severed head in my hands. Now, I'm shouting my lungs off in an empty alleyway. Hmmm... I think I've finally gone crazy. Orwas I already crazy and have just acknowledged it?  
  
I take a step forward as the darkness fades. "I said, 'come out' before I..."  
  
A loud crunching noise fills my ears, the sound of something snapping under pressure. I murmur a silent prayer, hoping it wasn't Taltmut's head again. Much to my relief, it wasn't a head, it was a corpse. Not good, really not good at all.  
  
Alongside it lay several other dead bodies, all rotten and decayed. It smells so horrible that I nearly throw up. The bile burns in my throat when I recognize the corpses.  
  
The burly-men-gang that robbed me. They're all slashed up... no, they're worse than that. It's like something literally chewed them up and spit them out. Sick! What the hell happened to them?!  
  
"You happened to them."  
  
Gasping as I finally hear a voice that isn't my own, I turn around to see someone standing behind me. The old hag simply gives me a toothless grin. The witch! She's screwing with my head!  
  
"You did this!" I accuse, nearly screaming as I point to the cadavers at my feet. She's a witch - a sorcerer's pet - she killed them. Now she's driving me insane, making me think I did it!  
  
"Poor, confused little boy," she murmurs sadly while shaking her head, "I saw them die, yes, but they did not die by my hand."  
  
My expression hardens as I approach, hoping she'll hit me with a magic attack spell. "Then...?"  
  
"It was you," she answers, "You killed them. You murdered them. They're dead. Ask your friends, it was they who investigated the case. They can tell you about the nice gory mess in the alley way."  
  
"Liar," I hiss. Her words are eating through my doubt. "You lie!"  
  
I couldn't have done it! I didn't kill anyone! I'm not a murderer!  
  
I just got into a fight when I was on my way out of the alley. They had cornered me, and, after I woke up, the burly men were nowhere in sight. But... I didn't really stay long enough to look around.  
  
[ "Hey, punk! Give me all your money, now!" ]  
  
But they didn't take my money...  
  
"You killed them," the old crone repeats.  
  
No. No. No, it couldn't be! I couldn't have killed anyone in my human form. I would have felt it if theyÂ'd used magic on me. Hell, I would have known! I would have known...  
  
"Fool," a familiar voice says from behind.  
  
I've reached the end of the road and am now standing before rusty iron gates. Hesitantly, I curl my blood stained hands around the handle and try to pull. The gate won't budge, refusing to open up for me. Pain throbbing through my skull, I try again, pushing my weight against the rusted metal.  
  
Open, damn you!  
  
Angry tears spill down my face as I press myself against the bars, seeking to get on the other side and away from this insanity. Sanctuary. The pain is intense, feeling like something is cracking my head open. Someone... please... let me in...   
  
I feel warm air brush against the back of my ear as a tall shadow falls down upon me. Turning my head, I meet violet eyes as a strong hand reaches out to settle on mine. With no effort at all, I turn the handle, and the gate slowly opens.  
  
/ * Yes... * \  
  
An arm wraps around my waist before I'm guided through the rusty gate and into... someplace else. I wince sharply. It feels like someone had just screamed in my ear.  
  
~ * CARROT, NO! * ~  
  
Big Mama?  
  
A shiver runs down my spine as her voice is drowned out by the sound of roaring flames consuming some village. A very familiar looking village I discover, as I take a couple steps forward for a closer look. Turning back, my eyes widen as I find myself alone again. The rusty gate, the party and Methuselah are all gone. All that is left is fire and the high pitch sounds of children screaming. They stop quickly, much to my relief and dread.  
  
Emerging from the bluish-black flames is a tall dark figure I know too well: the stalker of nightmares, Zaha Torte. However, this time he doesn't seem to see me as he advances. His hand seems to be leading something with him, away from the fires.  
  
Small fingers were wrapped around Zaha's larger ones, fingers that belong to a child. A young boy is trailing almost behind the Sorcerer, trying to keep up with the adult's stride. The whole image of that soul sucker with a child is just too surreal, and horribly familiar.  
  
Swallowing hard, I can't help but stare at the boy's face. He is smiling; smiling and happy standing by Zaha's side. Was this kid nuts? The little boy turns his head and looks up at the adult. He opens his mouth to ask something. A small smile appears on Zaha's face, shocking the hell out of me, as he answers the kid's question.  
  
The boy's smile terrifies me, because I've seen it before. I see the very same smile whenever I pass a mirror. That boy... that boy is... he's...  
  
[ "Are we going to make the new world now?" ]  
  
[ "Yes, Carrot." ]  
  
... Me.  
  
[ Author's Note ]  
  
Sorry that its been months since I last updated this story. Carrot refused to cooperate with me while writing this. Anyway, I believe I have three more chapters left, and will try to get them posted this year ^_^; 


End file.
